bluebell
Well-Known Member
My son came home last night ready to go to rehab. Currently in the middle of all the calls/application processes I'm sure some of you know quite well. This will be his first time in substance abuse treatment, he had a mental hospital stay in 2014. He is 'only' 20. I know the odds are against him. I know I've only got one shot at this for myself, if he relapses this will have to be on him. My husband is over the moon, I'm terribly saddened at what may be to come, he could bolt, he could leave, he could do well and then relapse like so many others. He's currently asleep and I'm working from home today to make sure he doesn't need to go to detox. But since it's pills he could be still taking them, although he really has nothing left, but pills are small. His room was cleaned out 6 weeks ago and most of his belongings have been lost in the couch surfing that followed.
A part of me feels the way I did when I brought him home as a newborn, I was scared - we had both barely made it. And his room was relatively empty - except for the weight of a life yet unlived. I felt a strong sense of survival and hope. But he is a man now, and that sense of survival and hope cannot be mine, it must be his.
I guess another part of me is upset that the run around continues, the peace in my home was so short-lived. I wish the rehab would call me back....
A part of me feels the way I did when I brought him home as a newborn, I was scared - we had both barely made it. And his room was relatively empty - except for the weight of a life yet unlived. I felt a strong sense of survival and hope. But he is a man now, and that sense of survival and hope cannot be mine, it must be his.
I guess another part of me is upset that the run around continues, the peace in my home was so short-lived. I wish the rehab would call me back....