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<blockquote data-quote="Origami" data-source="post: 643362" data-attributes="member: 18099"><p>Thanks everyone for the support, information, and advice. My husband, daughter in law and I had a long talk last night before difficult child got home from work. We didn't exactly script what we would say to him, but decided what we would focus on. In the past (a year ago when he first started using), some of these talks seemed to go south when things got too emotional or the kitchen sink was thrown in. </p><p></p><p>I think the talk went well overall, and unless difficult child backs out (which is still a possibility), he has agreed to go to rehab tonight after he gets off work. daughter in law will pick him up and take him. He wanted to work today and to talk to his boss about getting some time off to deal with his issues. His boss apparently likes him a lot and already gave him the "keys to the business" so to speak, so hopefully difficult child will actually do this and the boss will be OK with it.</p><p></p><p>When we were first talking last night, difficult child was visibly nervous, denied he had a problem, and said he'll just quit and there's no need for rehab. He admitted taking heroin a couple of times after the OD, however (since Saturday). I told him I know he's said he'd quit many times, and it can't be that easy to do without help or he would have already quit. daughter in law told him that he'll be unemployed, dead, or in jail if things keep going as they are. We learned that her parents had been addicts and even drug dealers while she was young, and she had some sad stories about how she and her siblings were neglected. She said she doesn't want that kind of lifestyle for her kids. By the end of the discussion, difficult child had agreed to go in this evening. husband had words of wisdom also since he had been an alcoholic for years before finally getting proper treatment for depression about 8 years ago. He told difficult child that he thinks he probably needs treatment for some underlying depression or mental issues and that we'll support him in any way with family therapy or whatever. (any way but financial, which we can't afford beyond the current room and board situation)</p><p></p><p></p><p>I'm still learning about this terrible addiction, I still can't quite comprehend the self-destructive nature of it all or why someone can't "just quit" with sheer willpower. But then again, I've never smoked a cigarette and obviously don't have an addictive personality. I do realize that mental illness is real though and not just something to be turned off like a light switch.</p><p></p><p>Thanks again for all the support and kind wishes. This all means a lot to me. I read and reread every answer and also to husband, who also says Thanks.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Origami, post: 643362, member: 18099"] Thanks everyone for the support, information, and advice. My husband, daughter in law and I had a long talk last night before difficult child got home from work. We didn't exactly script what we would say to him, but decided what we would focus on. In the past (a year ago when he first started using), some of these talks seemed to go south when things got too emotional or the kitchen sink was thrown in. I think the talk went well overall, and unless difficult child backs out (which is still a possibility), he has agreed to go to rehab tonight after he gets off work. daughter in law will pick him up and take him. He wanted to work today and to talk to his boss about getting some time off to deal with his issues. His boss apparently likes him a lot and already gave him the "keys to the business" so to speak, so hopefully difficult child will actually do this and the boss will be OK with it. When we were first talking last night, difficult child was visibly nervous, denied he had a problem, and said he'll just quit and there's no need for rehab. He admitted taking heroin a couple of times after the OD, however (since Saturday). I told him I know he's said he'd quit many times, and it can't be that easy to do without help or he would have already quit. daughter in law told him that he'll be unemployed, dead, or in jail if things keep going as they are. We learned that her parents had been addicts and even drug dealers while she was young, and she had some sad stories about how she and her siblings were neglected. She said she doesn't want that kind of lifestyle for her kids. By the end of the discussion, difficult child had agreed to go in this evening. husband had words of wisdom also since he had been an alcoholic for years before finally getting proper treatment for depression about 8 years ago. He told difficult child that he thinks he probably needs treatment for some underlying depression or mental issues and that we'll support him in any way with family therapy or whatever. (any way but financial, which we can't afford beyond the current room and board situation) I'm still learning about this terrible addiction, I still can't quite comprehend the self-destructive nature of it all or why someone can't "just quit" with sheer willpower. But then again, I've never smoked a cigarette and obviously don't have an addictive personality. I do realize that mental illness is real though and not just something to be turned off like a light switch. Thanks again for all the support and kind wishes. This all means a lot to me. I read and reread every answer and also to husband, who also says Thanks. [/QUOTE]
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