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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 643647" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Oragami, I am not a special person. I have LDs. I barely graduated high school. I have to keep a handle on my mental illness. But my kids and others have told me many times I have an amazing ability to logically figure out how somebody will behave or why. My kids think I'm magical that way..lol. Even my difficult child. Also, I tend to be so logical that I CAN'T delude myself. I go strictly by actions, not words.</p><p></p><p>I had no doubt your son was using drugs still. I think many difficult children are using drugs here, even though their parents don't know it yet or the extent of it. Of course, when it came to my own daughter, I stayed in willful denial just like other parents...lol. I knew...but I wouldn't let what I knew stick in my mind. I'm much better at figuring out what is going on with others and have been told that all of my life. People here have called me blunt. I don't know any other way to be. I see what I see. Doesn't mean I'm never wrong, of course. I just tend not to be good at sugarcoating stuff, even when I try. I don't mean to sound harsh either, but I know sometimes I probably do. I calls it as I sees it.</p><p></p><p>That is one reason, I'm sure, why my family of origin would get so mad at me. I was often so dead right on.</p><p></p><p>Like I said, my flaws are MANY, but I'm very good at figuring things out in a logical way, especially if it is not my own family member, of course.</p><p></p><p>I am so very sorry, that you had to find this out about your son. Heroin is very hard to kick. I'd take one day at a time, one moment at a time, one second at a time and enjoy every day he is sober, but don't get your hopes up too high or you may be in for another disappointment.</p><p></p><p>Honestly, I did not believe for over a year that my daughter would remain sober. My "cynical" was on high alert. I didn't want to fall hard so I went to Al-Anon and made it work for me. Even all these years later, I still worry that something will cause her to start using drugs again. Please either go to the wonderful organization (my opinion) of Al-Anon or at least get private therapy to help you cope and keep your stress level down.</p><p></p><p>A mother's mental work is never really done, but we can try to live in the moment and make our lives as good as possible even while our kids struggle. Right now your son is in good hands and is safe. You can relax. I'm glad you have some "down" time.</p><p></p><p>Big hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 643647, member: 1550"] Oragami, I am not a special person. I have LDs. I barely graduated high school. I have to keep a handle on my mental illness. But my kids and others have told me many times I have an amazing ability to logically figure out how somebody will behave or why. My kids think I'm magical that way..lol. Even my difficult child. Also, I tend to be so logical that I CAN'T delude myself. I go strictly by actions, not words. I had no doubt your son was using drugs still. I think many difficult children are using drugs here, even though their parents don't know it yet or the extent of it. Of course, when it came to my own daughter, I stayed in willful denial just like other parents...lol. I knew...but I wouldn't let what I knew stick in my mind. I'm much better at figuring out what is going on with others and have been told that all of my life. People here have called me blunt. I don't know any other way to be. I see what I see. Doesn't mean I'm never wrong, of course. I just tend not to be good at sugarcoating stuff, even when I try. I don't mean to sound harsh either, but I know sometimes I probably do. I calls it as I sees it. That is one reason, I'm sure, why my family of origin would get so mad at me. I was often so dead right on. Like I said, my flaws are MANY, but I'm very good at figuring things out in a logical way, especially if it is not my own family member, of course. I am so very sorry, that you had to find this out about your son. Heroin is very hard to kick. I'd take one day at a time, one moment at a time, one second at a time and enjoy every day he is sober, but don't get your hopes up too high or you may be in for another disappointment. Honestly, I did not believe for over a year that my daughter would remain sober. My "cynical" was on high alert. I didn't want to fall hard so I went to Al-Anon and made it work for me. Even all these years later, I still worry that something will cause her to start using drugs again. Please either go to the wonderful organization (my opinion) of Al-Anon or at least get private therapy to help you cope and keep your stress level down. A mother's mental work is never really done, but we can try to live in the moment and make our lives as good as possible even while our kids struggle. Right now your son is in good hands and is safe. You can relax. I'm glad you have some "down" time. Big hugs. [/QUOTE]
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