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The Watercooler
Remember last winter . . .
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 645894" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>So I look up the hill, and there's my car 50 feet or so above me, my house across from that. Down the hill another 50 feet or so is the lake and the other condos. I'm hanging there trying to decide what to do. I could try to get to the other condos...down is easier than up, but if I slide the wrong way I could end up in the lake. If I make it to the condos, I could break a window and get in somewhere and at least be warm, but likely the phones are off because it's a vacation area and the middle of winter. It's closer to get to my building if I get off the road and go across the landscaping, but it's a steep hill and I know that the back side of the retaining wall has big spikes that stick out of it! If I try that and slide back down??? Not good. </p><p></p><p>So...I figure up is how I go. I worked my way to the retaining wall with very little slipping down, using ice cracks as hand-holds, drape myself across it, and basically pull myself up the hill by the spikes on the other side of the wall. </p><p></p><p>Finally, I make it to the flat area, crawl to my door, fish my keys out, crawl inside...to my liquor cabinet.</p><p></p><p>After about four good pulls on the bottle of vodka, I called my office. Then I called the judge to ask for a continuance. He said, "Everyone else has made it to court, so can you!" </p><p></p><p>I told him if he wanted me at court he could damn well come get me himself! </p><p></p><p>Shockingly, I didn't go to jail and did get my continuance. </p><p></p><p>Thus endeth my story. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 645894, member: 17309"] So I look up the hill, and there's my car 50 feet or so above me, my house across from that. Down the hill another 50 feet or so is the lake and the other condos. I'm hanging there trying to decide what to do. I could try to get to the other condos...down is easier than up, but if I slide the wrong way I could end up in the lake. If I make it to the condos, I could break a window and get in somewhere and at least be warm, but likely the phones are off because it's a vacation area and the middle of winter. It's closer to get to my building if I get off the road and go across the landscaping, but it's a steep hill and I know that the back side of the retaining wall has big spikes that stick out of it! If I try that and slide back down??? Not good. So...I figure up is how I go. I worked my way to the retaining wall with very little slipping down, using ice cracks as hand-holds, drape myself across it, and basically pull myself up the hill by the spikes on the other side of the wall. Finally, I make it to the flat area, crawl to my door, fish my keys out, crawl inside...to my liquor cabinet. After about four good pulls on the bottle of vodka, I called my office. Then I called the judge to ask for a continuance. He said, "Everyone else has made it to court, so can you!" I told him if he wanted me at court he could damn well come get me himself! Shockingly, I didn't go to jail and did get my continuance. Thus endeth my story. :D [/QUOTE]
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