Residential treatment coming to a end

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Helpless29, Jan 14, 2020.

  1. Helpless29

    Helpless29 Member

    So my last post was about my 16 yr old son’s PO able to get him out of juvenile Detention and into a residential treatment center . Well turns out insurance only covers 6 weeks so my son will be released to his dad Jan 23rd .Though he’s doing so good in there & studying for his GED , every time I talk to him, all he careS about is getting out, says he only went there so he didn’t have to be in jail . I asked was he getting anything from therapy & he laughed like it was a joke, so I know he’s not ready to change but after 6 weeks , I didn’t think he would be, I’m starting to feel anxious & mentAlly preparing myself for it all to start again when he gets out. And something else bothering me, he had his friend send out his stuff to my house from when he left juvenile detention told me to put away, I opened the package it was letters , pics etc that people sent to him , but also he’s journal, I shouldn’t have it read it, but I did & the things he wrote about what his done ,not the drugs but the violence , is something I can’t even comprehend & beyond what I ever imagined.
     
    Last edited: Jan 14, 2020
  2. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    I was feeling so glad for you here, and then I read this:
    Helpless. Is he journaling about things he did or things he wants to do? Is it fantasy or real? Can you tell?

    Depending upon what he has written, you may not have the option of sitting with this, and not telling anyone. You have no legal obligation to tell anybody, that I'm aware of, but if your son is disclosing in his writings real stuff, he wants to do...or scary stuff he has done, I think I would want to consult with somebody, like a child psychiatrist or one of his therapists. How can you sit with that, if he could go ahead and get himself into more trouble, as is likely.

    Maybe there is some intervention that can be done. Maybe his stay in the residential treatment facility can be extended. I guess what I am saying is I would want to explore this violence with somebody.
     
  3. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    Helpless

    Your son is so very young. I know that doesn't help you at all by me saying that, but my son was a mess at 16.

    He got in a lot of legal trouble and no matter what happened, he did NOT care. He was a minor but in and out of rehabs and juvenile detention. He didn't care what happened to him or how it affected his family. At all. He was very careless with his LIFE. He was permanently kicked out of the Illinois school system as a sophomore and I was only able to get him back in by having him tested for Special Education (too smart to qualify) so used the anxiety diagnosis to get him a 504 plan thus enabling him to attend an alternative school. Whew.

    This was not typical of how he was raised or how he acted growing up - until the age of 15 when his evil twin took over - that is how I refer to that time in his/our lives now.

    My son is now 24 and is FINALLY doing what he needs to do. That is my silver lining. He is now on Zoloft which seems to help him and was his idea. I think maybe he "didn't feel right" once puberty hit and he was trying to self medicate and got farther and farther down the rabbit hole. Someday I will ask him what happened. I just cannot start that conversation right now.

    He used a lot of drugs starting at age 15. I tried everything that I could to change his "mindset". The "experts" were not able to help him. They said he was not reacting to therapy. HUH? Husband and I said maybe he "just wasn't a good person". We just didn't know what to think to be honest. We accepted the fact that we may lose him due to drug use or he may be in and out of jail as an adult.

    I don't know if any one thing that we did helped. I wish I knew what to tell you to help you cope with this. My prayer for you is that your son is able to change his life at some point and move forward. My son has a lot of time to make up for. I feel that he wasted so many good years of his life. It is just senseless. He does now say that he is "free". No more legal troubles and back in the fold with his family.

    If I had not gone to therapy and had this forum and the support of my husband and friends, I do not know how I could have made it through.
    :staystrong:
     
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