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Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) Placement???
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<blockquote data-quote="ck1" data-source="post: 64977" data-attributes="member: 3767"><p>Thanks for all of your feedback. There's a lot of good information here. SLSH, I agree with you. They need to be able to live in the real world, getting it "right" while at a placement doesn't count for much if they can't do the same at home. Unfortunately, right now, my difficult child doesn't seem to be getting right even at this respite center. He's not following the rules (keeping his room clean, participating in group, etc).</p><p></p><p>Peg2, my son sounds very much like yours. My son fluctuates from hating me to hating my husband. My difficult child has never had a normal relationship with his dad and it was very bad when my son was very young...maybe that has affected him forever??? There is talk of him being diagnosed with a cluster b personality disorder. This breaks my heart.</p><p></p><p>Yesterday he called to find out if he could come home for a visit this weekend. I said that I wasn't sure because I need to talk with his lawyer who is on vacation this week. Then I went on to say that there would be changes here. When he demanded to know what, I explained that the rules that have always been in place will be more vigorously enforced and a few will be added.</p><p></p><p>He was very unhappy about this, eventually hung up on me, and went into the director's office and told her that he doesn't want to come home because he refuses to follow our rules.</p><p></p><p>I am sick about this. Obviously, he doesn't get it and I'm feeling right now like he never will. If he can't accept responsibility for his actions and refuses to follow our rules, he cannot come home. I feel we will all be in danger the first time he's not allowed to do something he wants. So....where does he go until an Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) is available for him? Right now it seems like our only option is a shelter.</p><p></p><p>I don't have any family that can take him and I don't think his dad would be a good option. He (his dad) has porn all of the house, has been in and out of jail himself, and has serious substance abuse problems (I don't know if he still uses or not). He's never been involved in difficult child's life except the occasional weekend to swoop in and make me look like a meanie.</p><p></p><p>I have about two weeks to decide what to do and I am sick, feel very lonely, and that the weight of the world is on my shoulders.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ck1, post: 64977, member: 3767"] Thanks for all of your feedback. There's a lot of good information here. SLSH, I agree with you. They need to be able to live in the real world, getting it "right" while at a placement doesn't count for much if they can't do the same at home. Unfortunately, right now, my difficult child doesn't seem to be getting right even at this respite center. He's not following the rules (keeping his room clean, participating in group, etc). Peg2, my son sounds very much like yours. My son fluctuates from hating me to hating my husband. My difficult child has never had a normal relationship with his dad and it was very bad when my son was very young...maybe that has affected him forever??? There is talk of him being diagnosed with a cluster b personality disorder. This breaks my heart. Yesterday he called to find out if he could come home for a visit this weekend. I said that I wasn't sure because I need to talk with his lawyer who is on vacation this week. Then I went on to say that there would be changes here. When he demanded to know what, I explained that the rules that have always been in place will be more vigorously enforced and a few will be added. He was very unhappy about this, eventually hung up on me, and went into the director's office and told her that he doesn't want to come home because he refuses to follow our rules. I am sick about this. Obviously, he doesn't get it and I'm feeling right now like he never will. If he can't accept responsibility for his actions and refuses to follow our rules, he cannot come home. I feel we will all be in danger the first time he's not allowed to do something he wants. So....where does he go until an Residential Treatment Facility (RTF) is available for him? Right now it seems like our only option is a shelter. I don't have any family that can take him and I don't think his dad would be a good option. He (his dad) has porn all of the house, has been in and out of jail himself, and has serious substance abuse problems (I don't know if he still uses or not). He's never been involved in difficult child's life except the occasional weekend to swoop in and make me look like a meanie. I have about two weeks to decide what to do and I am sick, feel very lonely, and that the weight of the world is on my shoulders. [/QUOTE]
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