Robbing for drugs - update on 15 year son

Helpless29

Well-Known Member
I know many here have followed my post on my son, the drugs, the manipulation & his dark side. Last night he was hit by car, he tried robbing someone, I guess he sets up to meet with them to get drugs & robs them, yesterday it was robbery gone wrong & they hit him with car, broke his leg. My mind is racing , of all the what if’s, I cant help but write the ending to my story , I fear one day I’ll get the call no parent ever wants to get.
 

BusynMember

Well-Known Member
This is sad. I hurt for you. I am sorry your son got hurt too. Unfortunately stealing for drugs is common. It is something none of us want to know about our addicted kids. They also garbage pick discarded sales slips at, say Walmart, and use the receipts to return things they never bought. They just take them off the shelves and pretend they are returning them. I saw this on Intervention a few times. They sell nice things that WE buy them. Or steal from us to sell. This is the uglinessof drug addiction. He is probably using something that causes withdrawals so he is desperate. These are the drugs talking. Do you know his drug of choice? This extreme is not usually done for pot.

Did he get i to trouble? Can you get him into rehab?

I am so sorry.

Love and light!
 

RN0441

100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
Helpless

So sorry to hear this.

Please keep us updated.

You and your son are in my prayers.
 

Helpless29

Well-Known Member
This is sad. I hurt for you. I am sorry your son got hurt too. Unfortunately stealing for drugs is common. It is something none of us want to know about our addicted kids. They also garbage pick discarded sales slips at, say Walmart, and use the receipts to return things they never bought. They just take them off the shelves and pretend they are returning them. I saw this on Intervention a few times. They sell nice things that WE buy them. Or steal from us to sell. This is the uglinessof drug addiction. He is probably using something that causes withdrawals so he is desperate. These are the drugs talking. Do you know his drug of choice? This extreme is not usually done for pot.

Did he get i to trouble? Can you get him into rehab?

I am so sorry.

Love and light!
His drug of choice is prescription pills but also pot, I know he’s done more , but pills is his choice of drug. Here the rehabs centers they give him the choice to go,if he refuses to go they will not accept him. I don’t get it ,he’s only 15 and they let him make the decision ,not the parents .We’re going to see if he can get court ordered to go.
 

RN0441

100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
Wow only 15. Yes you should be able to do something to force. Are you in the US?
 

RN0441

100% better than I was but not at 100% yet
So what. You drive him there and tell him that you are his mother and you demand that he stay there and get treatment.

We did that.

He ran out and we brought him back in. Yes this was back at age 15 and 16 and 17 and.... Now he's 23.

If I had to do it over I would have shipped him off to a boarding school. From what I understand you can hire an attorney that can help you with all of this. It costs money but it will cost you money in the end anyway for attorneys, rehabs, doctor bills etc. That is my advice knowing what I know now - wish I had known it then. Hindsight really is 20/20.
 

Nature

Active Member
I understand your pain and frustration. I remember finding out that as a parent of a child who was 15 at the time I was not the one who could get him into rehab - it had to be him making the call and informing them he wanted in. His dad and I were horrified it worked this way and questioned why parents didn't have a say in this. Frustrating and heartbreaking. Those weeks he was on the streets I was heartbroken my child had chosen this lifestyle, I felt helpless to change him and even more so that the system also made me feel helpless. Why as parents have we no say if our children are underage?


Over the years I've had time to reflect on this and have come to know - no addict every recovers unless they want to change. No amount of pleading from loved ones is going to change their mindset unless they seriously want to seek a better life. The need for change has to come from within themselves. My son finally did make the call and did manage to get into rehab hundreds of miles from our home. He stayed clean for several years but relapsed at 19.

Saying all of that, our logical sides know that removing the addict from their environment can possibly make the difference in their recovery. So yes, frustrating as heck. Some places have drug court which seems to be a better way to solve substance abuse problems on our streets. As parents we don't want our children to come into contact with the law and yet it may be the only way they get help. I'm so sorry you are going through this.
 

Helpless29

Well-Known Member
I understand your pain and frustration. I remember finding out that as a parent of a child who was 15 at the time I was not the one who could get him into rehab - it had to be him making the call and informing them he wanted in. His dad and I were horrified it worked this way and questioned why parents didn't have a say in this. Frustrating and heartbreaking. Those weeks he was on the streets I was heartbroken my child had chosen this lifestyle, I felt helpless to change him and even more so that the system also made me feel helpless. Why as parents have we no say if our children are underage?


Over the years I've had time to reflect on this and have come to know - no addict every recovers unless they want to change. No amount of pleading from loved ones is going to change their mindset unless they seriously want to seek a better life. The need for change has to come from within themselves. My son finally did make the call and did manage to get into rehab hundreds of miles from our home. He stayed clean for several years but relapsed at 19.

Saying all of that, our logical sides know that removing the addict from their environment can possibly make the difference in their recovery. So yes, frustrating as heck. Some places have drug court which seems to be a better way to solve substance abuse problems on our streets. As parents we don't want our children to come into contact with the law and yet it may be the only way they get help. I'm so sorry you are going through this.
This is so sad & true. The only way we can get help if he’s been in the Juvenile Detention system, sadly he is on his way, with assaulting a teacher & stealing a bike, he will be going to court in October & we may finally get the help we need, not the way we wanted to,but at this point , I will take any help we can get. Not only does he abuse drugs, he is also very violent & aggressive.
 

Smithmom

Well-Known Member
All I can offer is sympathy. Everything you are experiencing I've felt. Everything you're going through I've done 100 times. Mine is now 28. I am thankful he's alive. That's about all I can hope for one day at a time. Every time I think he's hit bottom he just keeps going. No answers. Sounds like you're doing all you can and no one could ask more. One day at a time. Try everything.
 
Top