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Parent Emeritus
Sad mother, bipolar daughter
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 699759" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Write down services, such as shelters, county mental health facilities so she has somewhere to go for her bipolar, local food pantries, social services so she can apply for SSI, food stamps and ?lmedical assistance and housing. Give her the names of the resources that will help her take care of herself. She may get angry, but she'll feel good about herself if she does this herself.</p><p></p><p>She will feel and be helpless and incapable if she doesn't learn to take these hard steps herself.</p><p></p><p>I had no support from family or my first husband and was a total mess in my 20s, but I refused to give up on myself and did all I could to get my anxiety disorders and moods under control. I did work. It wasn't always easy. I had moodswings and was miserable so I added therapy and self help books to my crusade to get well. I got stronger. The medications stabilized my moods. I took minimal medications but they saved my life.</p><p></p><p>I did get stable. I don't think I would have done it, because it was hard, if my parents would have doled out money and pity for me. It was something I needed to do myself. And I needed to know I couldn't just be depressed behind my mother's skirt. I had to realize that I had to do this on my own or be misetable. I didn't want to be sick and unstable.</p><p></p><p>I got so much better. Honestly, I worked hard and my life ended up good and I was able to have the things most of us want...a loving 2nd husband after leaving the first one. Beautiful kids, love, and stability. I take my medications still, go to therapy and try to encourage young people with mental illness.</p><p></p><p>I don't think it ever helps if we feel so sorry for our mentally ill kids that they never have to get well. There is lots of good treatment out there. They just have to use it. We can not be their solution. We dont have the ability; the knowledge. We see them as our poor children too, but they are adults.</p><p></p><p>If they choose not to get help after given the resources, that is their burden, not yours. We can't live forever. They have to figure it out.</p><p></p><p>Big hugs and prayers for strength. You can do this.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 699759, member: 1550"] Write down services, such as shelters, county mental health facilities so she has somewhere to go for her bipolar, local food pantries, social services so she can apply for SSI, food stamps and ?lmedical assistance and housing. Give her the names of the resources that will help her take care of herself. She may get angry, but she'll feel good about herself if she does this herself. She will feel and be helpless and incapable if she doesn't learn to take these hard steps herself. I had no support from family or my first husband and was a total mess in my 20s, but I refused to give up on myself and did all I could to get my anxiety disorders and moods under control. I did work. It wasn't always easy. I had moodswings and was miserable so I added therapy and self help books to my crusade to get well. I got stronger. The medications stabilized my moods. I took minimal medications but they saved my life. I did get stable. I don't think I would have done it, because it was hard, if my parents would have doled out money and pity for me. It was something I needed to do myself. And I needed to know I couldn't just be depressed behind my mother's skirt. I had to realize that I had to do this on my own or be misetable. I didn't want to be sick and unstable. I got so much better. Honestly, I worked hard and my life ended up good and I was able to have the things most of us want...a loving 2nd husband after leaving the first one. Beautiful kids, love, and stability. I take my medications still, go to therapy and try to encourage young people with mental illness. I don't think it ever helps if we feel so sorry for our mentally ill kids that they never have to get well. There is lots of good treatment out there. They just have to use it. We can not be their solution. We dont have the ability; the knowledge. We see them as our poor children too, but they are adults. If they choose not to get help after given the resources, that is their burden, not yours. We can't live forever. They have to figure it out. Big hugs and prayers for strength. You can do this. [/QUOTE]
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