Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Sadly new here
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 704476" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>The thing is, you can't make him go to rehab. If he consents to go, often people go many times and still dont quit. They have to want it desperately. Personally I am not sure college is in the cards for him right now. He has more pressing priorities. Hard ones, like the drugs.</p><p></p><p>Having had a daughter who used cocaine and meth and other drugs (and I didn't think she used drugs all the time either, but she did) you can't force a legal adult to do anything. I would never have been as easy on him for the pot and staying out all night while living under my roof...not happening. You are an adult under my roof, you follow my rules. You can do what you want once you are on your own and self supporting, but not until then...it was horrible that he put his parents through that.</p><p></p><p>We were tough on daughter and she quit on her own after we made her leave for throwing a drug party in our house. We walked in on it. She had to leave after that. </p><p></p><p>She found somewhere to go but it wasn't fun for her and we cut off the money train 100% so she got a job and quit all drugs. That was twelve years ago. Her life is excellent now. We are going to her house for Christmas. She used from 12 (yes 12) to 19 then decided to quit. She is 33 and a fine mother and SO and homeowner. </p><p></p><p>But there is no fast fix for drug abuse and, contrary to what you think, your son likely uses every day and they are serious drugs. Just because he doesn't have extra drugs to sell doesn't mean he doesn't have drugs for himself for getting high. It is common, but not a good sign, that he is selling drugs as well as using them.</p><p></p><p>I admit I didn't read the entire post, but I did read about half of it. Please keep your guard up and dont expect this to go away soon. I'm sure he started because he lost his peer group and passion but why he started doesn't matter. Once they get involved in drugs, even pot which kills motivation, it is not a fast path to sobriety.</p><p></p><p>I would not be too lenient about this. Nor would I think I could fix it. We all thought that We could fix our adult kids and we can only fix one person...ourselves. That's all.</p><p></p><p>I hope you can stay strong and go to Al Anon and maybe also private therapy. Having been through this, it is not easy nor is it for the faint of heart. This is so hard to find about our adult kids...but if they are legally 18 there is nothing we can do. Except for us. We csn help us cope. Be good to yourself.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 704476, member: 1550"] The thing is, you can't make him go to rehab. If he consents to go, often people go many times and still dont quit. They have to want it desperately. Personally I am not sure college is in the cards for him right now. He has more pressing priorities. Hard ones, like the drugs. Having had a daughter who used cocaine and meth and other drugs (and I didn't think she used drugs all the time either, but she did) you can't force a legal adult to do anything. I would never have been as easy on him for the pot and staying out all night while living under my roof...not happening. You are an adult under my roof, you follow my rules. You can do what you want once you are on your own and self supporting, but not until then...it was horrible that he put his parents through that. We were tough on daughter and she quit on her own after we made her leave for throwing a drug party in our house. We walked in on it. She had to leave after that. She found somewhere to go but it wasn't fun for her and we cut off the money train 100% so she got a job and quit all drugs. That was twelve years ago. Her life is excellent now. We are going to her house for Christmas. She used from 12 (yes 12) to 19 then decided to quit. She is 33 and a fine mother and SO and homeowner. But there is no fast fix for drug abuse and, contrary to what you think, your son likely uses every day and they are serious drugs. Just because he doesn't have extra drugs to sell doesn't mean he doesn't have drugs for himself for getting high. It is common, but not a good sign, that he is selling drugs as well as using them. I admit I didn't read the entire post, but I did read about half of it. Please keep your guard up and dont expect this to go away soon. I'm sure he started because he lost his peer group and passion but why he started doesn't matter. Once they get involved in drugs, even pot which kills motivation, it is not a fast path to sobriety. I would not be too lenient about this. Nor would I think I could fix it. We all thought that We could fix our adult kids and we can only fix one person...ourselves. That's all. I hope you can stay strong and go to Al Anon and maybe also private therapy. Having been through this, it is not easy nor is it for the faint of heart. This is so hard to find about our adult kids...but if they are legally 18 there is nothing we can do. Except for us. We csn help us cope. Be good to yourself. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
Sadly new here
Top