Star*
call 911........call 911
Take yer' pick. I look like Hagrid, and I FEEL haggered. Isn't it nice when your children make it so easy for you to detach? You know? When I pray, I'm not exactly sure that I make it specific anymore. It's more like what I used to think were the ramblings of a drunkard at the end of a bar on last call...'I hewwwaahhaaannnndanah ahhhhhhh annnnnnnnnnd aaaaaahhh' and I would look over at him with a smile, nod and make that finger twirly around my nogging symbol to everyone else. (koo koo).Now I'm not so sure he didn't have a difficult child and may have been praying. Any given moment the last few days I too could have been mistaken by any number of people for doing the "I hewahanaaaaadanah ahhhhhhhhh annnnnnnnnnd ahhhhhhh' kind of talking except I did not (promise you) add alcohol. I swear to you I.DID.NOT. Had I? I'd be sitting in the corner laughing at bugs and butterflies and rappidly bee burrburing my lips and waiting for the guys in the white coats to take me to HAPPYVILLE. (thoughts of craftclass and popsicle sticks run through my mind) Anyway - short story long - Boy is NOT a Father, and he did NOT get married. I on the other hand took the opportunity to enter the pharmacy this evening to photograph pictures of condoms and THEIR price, and the aisle marker FAMILY PLANNING. Then went into the aisle marked BABY and photographed that marker along with 25 BASIC items and their price necessary for a BABY. Then after receiving the text that I am NOT a gma? I sent that JACKWAGON that 6 part text STARTING with TROJANS, followed by FAMILY PLANNING - and ending with my summation as a bookkeeper of one weeks upkeep for a pooping, burping, barfing, crying, cuddly, gassy, bundle of JOY...and then asked (like the jerk that I am -where DID we put THAT post?) if he wanted to puruse trying to do this IN A TENT, cost of a tent, lot rent, what DSS would say about no running water or electricity, how he made fun of the people down the road for living in a camper - Was it SO FUNNY NOW? Had he considered what HE would do if she died in childbirth? BECAUSE I had already RAISED two of his "children" and it was NOT happening in NO uncertain terms. AND as of 11:06? I have not heard a peep out of Mr. Smartie. Pants.The very last thing I told him was that since the Good Lord gave him YET ANOTHER second chance to live his life...MY ADVICE would be TAKE IT AND RUN LIKE --------the WIND. (but that certainly was NOT my first choice of word) because if this was HER plan to get HIM to marry him? She is more twisted than HE is, and I'm SO GLAD THEY made it easy for me to walk away from this not feeling diddly poo undery my shoe. I have spent the entire week - sleepless, crabby, snappy - and I have things to do for ME....my business I'm trying to get ready - and I spent it tossing and turning for THIS? Buuuuuuuuuuulllllllll ohhhhhhhhhhhh kneeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. So Hagrid it is.......and Hagrid it shall remain......and the text I blew his direction would make that storm Igor look like a leaky faucet. Hurricaine Star blew threw Dudes life and leveled the game field. And now? I'm going to have a sugar free something and go to bed. DF has a hearing test in the morning and they've asked ME to go. BOY did that make HIM angry. I'm not thrilled about it either....but they want a familiar voice??? I'm thinking - I can tell you nothing more than you can do in that booth. The man is %U@)(#$*@_@)($ deaf and it ()#U$)@(#U%$_{)(@u me off. ALL. DANG. DAY. repeat, repeat, repeat....(but there is nothing wrong with him either) I finally told HIM too - EITHER YOU go get your )(#$)(@#0 hearing tested OR READ THIS BOOK ON SIGNING and we take a class!!!!!!!!! Cause I'm so sick of repeating, reapeating, reapeating, reapeating, reapeating, reapeating....and I said THAT like 100 times walking away. He finally made the call. UGH. It's a good day to whup somebodys butt.
It doesn't even phase his mother anymore. Glad he's not going to be and you were able to make him speechless. You could use a little peace and quiet.
