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Scared and Confused: Depressed brother might be a danger.
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 713118" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Thats why you need to leave. If you dont, yes, he will hurt someone or worse. And nobody can force him to take medication long term. Its his choice. Not that it would work. Medication doesnt cure violent meanness. Your brother should not live with other people.</p><p></p><p>It is your decision if you want to risk your life for an out of control, very angry and cruel man who is so dangerous he cant even know where your sisters live. Your sisters are smart. I would do what they are doing.</p><p></p><p>Why are you so worried about this person, brother or not, who threw a hammer at your mother? He doesnt care about you or your mother and you cant make it better. You havent so far and never will. You dont have that power. He could and may end up in prison. Let him do that to somebody else. Whoa.</p><p></p><p>Again, I suggest therapy for YOU. For some reason you think you are doing good by letting him domesticslly abuse you. Same for your mother, but you cant make her go for help. You can not fix or control anybody but yourself. It is as if you are trapped in an abusive marriage.</p><p></p><p>Your brother is a criminal. If he was a son of mine, hurting me and my other loved ones and threatening to kill them, he would be gone with a restraining order against him. If he threw a hammer at me I would have also pressed charges. That is the only way he MIGHT get help...letting him act like a monster with no consequences does not help him or anyone. Maybe nothing can help him, but at least you would be safer and mom and dad too. Madness to just allow it.</p><p></p><p>Very abusive situation in which you and mom and even dad let a dangerous full grown man rule your life in fear and violence yet worry about HIS feelings. Do you see that this is twisted thinking? Were any of you abused in thebpast so that you started to think the abuser is a poor thing? That an abuser neefs your undying support and compassion? Something is very off here.</p><p></p><p>There is nothing you can do as long as you feel loyalty and pity for your abuser. Thats what he is. There is no excuse for his behavior other than some family allows it. Mental illness is no excuse either. He isnt that sick. He knows what he is doing and shows no remorse. Psychopathy? This is NOT depression.</p><p></p><p>He needs to be gone or his terror will continue. Or you need to go before he hurts or kills you. Yes, he could do either. Seek help at a center for domestic abuse. You deserve better than this scary abuse. Maybe Dad and Mom will actually follow your lead if you do it. The way things are now, nothing good will come of this.</p><p></p><p>Nobody should tolerate abuse, grown child or not. Nobody has a right to terrorize another. You need to wake up and realize that he is not the victim. YOU ARE.</p><p></p><p>I wish you a safe future with some good professional therapy and a new home without this man knowing your address.</p><p></p><p>I truly believe almost, if not all, the mothers on this forum would have made him leave long ago. Many of us have and few are as violent as your brother.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 713118, member: 1550"] Thats why you need to leave. If you dont, yes, he will hurt someone or worse. And nobody can force him to take medication long term. Its his choice. Not that it would work. Medication doesnt cure violent meanness. Your brother should not live with other people. It is your decision if you want to risk your life for an out of control, very angry and cruel man who is so dangerous he cant even know where your sisters live. Your sisters are smart. I would do what they are doing. Why are you so worried about this person, brother or not, who threw a hammer at your mother? He doesnt care about you or your mother and you cant make it better. You havent so far and never will. You dont have that power. He could and may end up in prison. Let him do that to somebody else. Whoa. Again, I suggest therapy for YOU. For some reason you think you are doing good by letting him domesticslly abuse you. Same for your mother, but you cant make her go for help. You can not fix or control anybody but yourself. It is as if you are trapped in an abusive marriage. Your brother is a criminal. If he was a son of mine, hurting me and my other loved ones and threatening to kill them, he would be gone with a restraining order against him. If he threw a hammer at me I would have also pressed charges. That is the only way he MIGHT get help...letting him act like a monster with no consequences does not help him or anyone. Maybe nothing can help him, but at least you would be safer and mom and dad too. Madness to just allow it. Very abusive situation in which you and mom and even dad let a dangerous full grown man rule your life in fear and violence yet worry about HIS feelings. Do you see that this is twisted thinking? Were any of you abused in thebpast so that you started to think the abuser is a poor thing? That an abuser neefs your undying support and compassion? Something is very off here. There is nothing you can do as long as you feel loyalty and pity for your abuser. Thats what he is. There is no excuse for his behavior other than some family allows it. Mental illness is no excuse either. He isnt that sick. He knows what he is doing and shows no remorse. Psychopathy? This is NOT depression. He needs to be gone or his terror will continue. Or you need to go before he hurts or kills you. Yes, he could do either. Seek help at a center for domestic abuse. You deserve better than this scary abuse. Maybe Dad and Mom will actually follow your lead if you do it. The way things are now, nothing good will come of this. Nobody should tolerate abuse, grown child or not. Nobody has a right to terrorize another. You need to wake up and realize that he is not the victim. YOU ARE. I wish you a safe future with some good professional therapy and a new home without this man knowing your address. I truly believe almost, if not all, the mothers on this forum would have made him leave long ago. Many of us have and few are as violent as your brother. [/QUOTE]
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