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Substance Abuse
Scared to Death
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<blockquote data-quote="Kathy813" data-source="post: 672462" data-attributes="member: 1967"><p>Hi Gabby. Is your daughter a senior? Is she on track to graduate on time?</p><p></p><p>She is at a very difficult age. There are things that you can do, though. Stop providing her all the comforts that come with being a contributing family member. Stop paying for her phone! If she wants a phone, she can get a job and pay for it. She would still be able to get a hold of you in an emergency. I guarantee every one of her friends have a phone. Or, in a true emergency, the police or hospital would contact you.</p><p></p><p>Stop giving her any money at all. It is just going to be used for buying drugs. Again, if she wants spending money she can get out of bed and get a job like the rest of us.</p><p></p><p>Personally, I would not keep her in your home. Look for a respected rehab facility and give her a choice of going to rehab or moving out. She is not going to suddenly stop using drugs or hanging out with her loser friends.</p><p></p><p>Keep posting. All of us have been in your shoes and we understand what you are going through. There are no right answers and take what advice you like and leave the rest.</p><p></p><p>One thing that really helped me when I first got here (over ten years ago) was a saying someone shared from AlAnon:</p><p></p><p>"You didn't cause this, you can't control it, and you can't cure it."</p><p></p><p>I have seen a fourth "C" added, too. All you can do is learn to cope with it.</p><p></p><p>~Kathy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kathy813, post: 672462, member: 1967"] Hi Gabby. Is your daughter a senior? Is she on track to graduate on time? She is at a very difficult age. There are things that you can do, though. Stop providing her all the comforts that come with being a contributing family member. Stop paying for her phone! If she wants a phone, she can get a job and pay for it. She would still be able to get a hold of you in an emergency. I guarantee every one of her friends have a phone. Or, in a true emergency, the police or hospital would contact you. Stop giving her any money at all. It is just going to be used for buying drugs. Again, if she wants spending money she can get out of bed and get a job like the rest of us. Personally, I would not keep her in your home. Look for a respected rehab facility and give her a choice of going to rehab or moving out. She is not going to suddenly stop using drugs or hanging out with her loser friends. Keep posting. All of us have been in your shoes and we understand what you are going through. There are no right answers and take what advice you like and leave the rest. One thing that really helped me when I first got here (over ten years ago) was a saying someone shared from AlAnon: "You didn't cause this, you can't control it, and you can't cure it." I have seen a fourth "C" added, too. All you can do is learn to cope with it. ~Kathy [/QUOTE]
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