As a brief summary, last year difficult child was on an IEP for ED- at the time he had diagnosis of depression and disruptive conduct not otherwise specified. He was on prozac, relatively stable, and doing pretty well in school. Then, in winter he started having problems again and showing other signs at home. psychiatrist increased prozac, but sd had already had enough and put difficult child on long term suspension then they wanted him to go to a special behavior scool, which I refused. The weekend after that difficult child goes on crime spree and racks up 7 charges in about 1 1/2 to 2 hrs. psychiatrist then decided difficult child was bipolar. I appealed the long term suspension and sd agreed to review IEP before school started this year. We had the meeting but the written IEP only included monitoring and reporting his behavior so I wouldn't sign it. I wrote a letter stating a few minor accommodations I thought should be included so they said we'd have another meeting. When I show up to that one, they agreed to the accommodations but had a social worker and educational specialist there who said she wanted to assess my difficult child hersself and asked for my permission. I signed that IEP and said I'd think about the sd assessment. (We had been going on the report from private neuropsychologist. testing I had done about 18 mos. ago.) I emailed educ. spec. later and said I'd agree and would welcome her suggestions for a more effective IEP, however, the diagnosis and overall treatment should be done by the private people I have involved. (I have arranged to have difficult child evaluation. by specialist here in Oct. to get another set of eyes reviewing the bipolar question.) The Educ. spec. emailed back and said she wanted to do a psychiatric evaluation on him and this would mean that eligibility would be reviewed again, but she thought everyone knew he had issues so that probably wouldn't be a problem. She said they would need to have another IEP meeting to decide all components she should assess and that if I couldn't attend, I could sign an agreement afterwards. Now, my bro is filing for custody of my difficult child which means he's trying to prove that difficult child's issues are a result of living with me. The sd doesn't want to accept the private diagnosis because it means they need to make accommodations. I understand they haven't directly seen all the symptons and have never done their own assessment, but there are people over there who made it clear to me that they think difficult child is smart, manipulative, and knows right from wrong, and they think he's in control of all his behavior and should just be punished more. I want the IEP eligibility based on the diagnosis from psychiatrists and other private specialists. they know more about the symptons that come out at home and things my difficult child has told them in confidence. I would be fine with sd's assessment for IEP strategies and to provide private docs with- the sd's perspective. Is there a way to achieve this without leaving the door open for sd to say they see nothing wrong with difficult child- I just need to punish him more- then my difficult child won't qualify for IEP and my bro will use this info for custody hearing?