Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by gcvmom, Mar 29, 2010.

  1. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    difficult child 1 is behind in 4 of his classes due to a variety of reasons. He's had plenty of time to catch up on the work. Last week, I reminded him of the different times during the day when he could work on this stuff. This weekend I did the same. He chose, instead, to not do the work. So last night husband said he was going to make him sit out his lacrosse game today. I followed through and emailed the coach to let him know.

    difficult child 1 goes ballistic when he finds this out, and husband... husband looks at me in shock and acts like he can't believe I actually followed through! :mad: Then he proceeds to tell me what I've done wrong in handling this situation. :mad::mad:

    This morning, difficult child 1 starts out okay, but then by the time we get to school he's ticked again because of this consequence and is arguing about it the whole way to school. Then he's kicking the car when he gets out and stomps off to class. Then I get a text that he hates me. I reply with his current grades and number of missing assignments and tell him to pick the lowest graded course and get the late work DONE. To which he replies with an F-bomb and calling me a female dog. Then he says if he can't play in the game today, he's quitting school (I'm laughing at this now). I told him to be sure to let the office know so they could update the truant officer. (His response is for me to go to hell). LOVE it.

    And ever the helpful parent/spouse, husband is acting like he's above all this and is not going to get involved with any help or support because he doesn't think I'm accepting his "advice" -- which is actually criticism, instead of a suggestion for how to proceed. I feel like running away and letting chips fall wherever they may.

    Oh, and I found difficult child 1 in the garage with another porn DVD two nights ago. He doesn't know I threw it out, but last night I caught him trying to sneak out in the garage again.

    And something else in the back of my mind -- we put difficult child 1 back on Elavil about two weeks ago, and I'm wondering if that's contributing to all this garbage.
  2. DazedandConfused

    DazedandConfused Active Member

    Ugh! Hugs to you dear lady.

    It's been a bit of a circus around here, too. I'm glad you followed through, even though you risked a maelstrom and then got one. I've often thought of running away, far away. husband grrrrrrr...I'm afraid to ask, what was his solution?

    When Son (and Daughter back in the day) says he hates me I just say calmly, "Yeah, I know". Though, mostly I'm "selfish" and "only spend money on yourself" and I "hate" him. This of course is because yesterday I wouldn't run down to Walmart and buy him some cheap bike for him to abuse and break because the EXPENSIVE one he got for his birthday needs repairs because he is so hard on it. Then, after trying to fix it himself he comes into the house hands covered grease, frustrated and angry. He then refuses to wash his hands and proceeds to put his hands on the walls:mad:. I almost started crying because I see our remodel looking a mess because of him.
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Argh!!!!!!!! Definitely sounds like you need a break. I think it's good you followed through and wish your husband would follow through with you! Many hugs.
  4. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Sounds to me like husband just volunteered to parent difficult child 1 through these trials and tribulations. Grrr. I swear... I would be tempted to inform husband that he's now in charge. AND difficult child 1 would pay dearly for addressing me that way. :devil:
  5. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    The texting did have me laughing! Angry texting to boot!

    Maybe the medication is contributing but... and husband needs to play Mommy a bit also.
    You need a calgon moment chicky!
  6. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I can't speak to the medication having any contribution but I can tell you that the cell phone would be my possession the first minute I lay eyes on him. Cell phones shouldn't be taken to school and they definitely shouldn't be used to verbally abuse your parent. Were he my son, that would be the first to go today when he gets home for school. It's a privilege, not a necessity, and it was abused.

    As far as husband, sorry that you all aren't on the same page. Frustrating and lonely to be sure.....

  7. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Today is another day... thank God. Someone pinch me the next time that happens so I wake up, K?