I can't help myself. I just loose it with my difficult child son. Then I feel like the worlds worst mom! Yesterday we were cleaning for company and he was trying to get out of helping, and lying, and smarting back to me and I just lost it. I was screaming in his face because I just snap when he gets like that. I know the screaming doesn't change anything and his behavior is not going to change, but I don't know how to stop. I do so wonderful with him day to day and lately things have been awesome up until yesterday. No one else in the world can push my buttons like that little boy can, yet I love no one else in the world like him! Now I am balling and crying because I have such horrible mommy guilt. I've apologized and kissed and hugged him, but I don't know if he beleives me because it has happened before. How do I stop from getting to this boiling point?