First a little background: I am fairly new to the world of the difficult child. I had a easy child until she was about 12 and then there was a very slow slide to the difficult child side. When she hit 17, the stuff really hit the fan. Her most recent episode was up and leaving college (7 hours away), meeting up with a guy she'd met on the internet (whom she'd "known" for 3 weeks online) and taking off to North Carolina with him to "live". We told her she had to formally withdraw from school (she, a former honor student, was failing everything) and return home to get a job. When she saved enough money and paid her debts, she would be able to get an apt and live wherever she wanted. That was February. She lived with diagnosis until a month ago and did absolutely nothing to look for a job. She sunbathed, surfed the internet, skyped with her "true love" (a guy she's only seen in person for 48 hours), watched tv and ate. She had a blowout with him (loonnnng story) and moved in with me. We just moved back to our home following a house fire in Oct, so there is much to do and I'm working her like crazy. Still, she does have to get a job. I can't pay for her health insurance, and she'll be off of X's in June when she turns 19. We don't give her money, but she really doesn't seem to care. I get her up at 9:00 five days a week and make her work around the house until after dinner. And I do mean work. She does the work, does a reasonably good job, complains minimally. I refuse to let her lie around and veg except on weekends. I sat her down last weekend and told her I really appreciated her help around here, but it's time for her to find full time work. She wants to go to cosmetology school in the fall (she thinks, in her delusional mind that this will be in North Carolina). I told her that her free school ride was over and she would have to pay herself. You don't just walk away from an expensive private college with the only explaination being "it wasn't a good fit". I told her I knew she'd been lying about job hunting in the past and called her on a few specifics Lying has always been a huge issue with her. But how in heck do you MAKE someone look for a job? I sent her out to an agency yesterday and I know she went. She did apply at a salon and said she'd applied for a waituress position the day before. She claims to be filling out apps online. It's hard enough to find a job - even if you're trying. I really cannot throw her out. I'm not there yet in the tough love world. She's a sweet, loving and fairly compliant girl. She feels completely abandoned by her dad - he left us suddenly back in 2006 and, now that he's angry with her he is ignoring her completely. He hasn't made any effort to see her in the last month other than acceping a dinner invite from me and running into her during the move. Sorry this is so long. She refuses counseling right now and seems happy to be "stuck". Advice?