Greetings Veterans. Stumbled on this site looking for therapeutic placement options and haves perused some of the threads and even after seeking out some of the acronyms used on here--still don't know what half of them are. So I'll just speak in English. Situation is this: 16 YO daughter with escalating ODD/pathological lying behaviors for the last eight years. High conflict divorce preceded behavior by a year or two. (who was already strong-willed )Lives with me and another younger sister. Went to live with extremely passive father and abusive wife for last 16 months in a nearby city. Came back to live with me 10 days ago. She is worse than before she left. We have done counseling in the past to no avail and it didn't last. She has excellent coverage on her father's insurance so I made it mandatory that she go to counseling. First session was last evening. She went alone as I had already met with counselor prior alone as well. At this point I only have her feedback from that meeting. (not fruitful I'm sure) I have set up an arrangement that she will be going weekly. Although she tells me that she will not be going. She says lots of things. From my readings on here I know that I am not alone in living with a profanity-laced, utterly disrespectful, willful defiant, apathetic, self-centered child who is imploding before my eyes. I live with Jekyl and the world sees Hyde. She has never responded well to discipline, although easier to "manage" when she was younger. She is a pathological liar and has a very unhealthy internal processing of perceptions. The irony is that she is intelligent, gifted athletically, pretty, makes good grades- even in honors classes- but does not apply herself to her optimum. If she could get her act together and keep it together, she could quite possibly be in contention for a scholarship for athletics. I could go on and on but am pretty confident that she does not have mental illness---has a bent towards mild hyperactivity (that is channeled into sports) but still is extremely emotionally immature and does not find ways to pacify herself, or organize herself. (at home) ***I'm not in denial, I look for EVERYTHING. Also worth mentioning- she is not into drugs, mild experimentation, but I can't even get this girl to take an aspirin. She does have anxiety that she will admit to but I think it is much much more than that and she internalizes it. Sounds like a spoiled brat with indulgent passive parenting right? It would to me too. But I can assure you that she has NOT been overindulged, coddled or manipulated me. (That is part of her rub, it doesn't work on me.) Bottom line is this....I need to remove her from my home. Do not think the counseling will garner much traction but will stick with it and require it of her until I can get a plan B in action. Don't know if I can wait until this semester of school is over. I am living an absolute nightmare. And it is adversely affecting my 14 yo other daughter.(Who is a different bird and only have "normal" teenage issues with.) And I refuse to live this way. Have been all over the net looking into therapeutic wilderness programs---she is not extremely prissy and it would be potentially a therapeutic setting for her,as well as therapeutic residential schools. Have even looking into state run residential option (relinquishing parental rights as I'm reading in some cases). Returning to her father's house not a good idea. Step-mom abusive. He allows it and does not protect her. She and her father have about the same emotional maturity, but he's fun to be around sometimes. As many of you, know these facilities and programs are astronomically priced. There is no way I could afford these. I have not a clue what to do. I need a miracle. And I'm pretty tapped at spinning my wheels on the net researching etc. Not to mention the regurgitation of the case study. I have been proactive about this for years. Altered my parenting, have made mistakes as we all do with our 1st born. Read dozens of books, remained consistent, but I live not in guilt for what I have or haven't done. All that said, I realize that she is crying out for help, Yet I can't make her be receptive or responsive. This is her problem, her choices and consequences. Reprieve. Sigh.