I got the newsletter from Hazeldon and the topic was self help vs mutual aid It compares their group (like AA) to self help. The idea is that with- self help a person wants to and believes they can do it themselves. With mutual aid, the power of the group helps one another get better. Does this apply at all to our difficult children? I'm not talking about drinking or drugging. I'm talking about faulty thinking, impulsiveness, poor choices... Do they realize they are making these poor choices? Do they want to get better? Do they think they can do this on their own? Do they want help from others? Who are these "others?" Can we help them? If so, how much is appropriate? It seems to me that we just can not do it all...it kinda is impossible. Also, do you think group therapy would help our difficult children? Here is the newsletter... Self-Help or Mutual Aid? Assisting Others The Twelve Step movement is sometimes called a self-help program. This falls short of describing what it really is. Mutual aid might be a better term. Self-help implies that an individual will help himself or herself. Mutual aid is a much different sort of thing. With mutual aid, we do help ourselves, but we have found that the best way to do this is by helping each other. Self-help says, "I can do it," whereas mutual aid says, "We can do it." We should not dismiss the idea of self-help or of doing one's best in achieving self-improvement. We must know, however, that we need the assistance and loving help of others for our highest growth. There are times when we will feel helpless and alone. That's when mutual aid will carry the day for us and perhaps even save our lives.