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<blockquote data-quote="hearthope" data-source="post: 47299" data-attributes="member: 2389"><p>Barbara your post reminds me of the journey.</p><p></p><p>I am working, the school calls and tells me your son left campus. He didn't sneak off, she was standing there telling him to go to class and he continued to walk off. </p><p></p><p>There was disbelief. How could MY son act this way? </p><p></p><p>Shame. They must think I am a horrible mother. </p><p></p><p></p><p>Then it became a never ending process. Each agency I sought out for help, I had to start at the beginning and recount all the terrible things my son had done. Then I was questioned about each response I made when he did these things.</p><p></p><p>I remember each time saying to myself this is not my fault. I am going to be strong this time. I did the best I could.</p><p>I remember being knocked down each time and feeling like a worthless mom that ruined her child. </p><p></p><p>After so much exposure of raw nerves, it is a wonder I survived. </p><p></p><p>I have also had the chance to see the other side now.</p><p></p><p></p><p>My easy child is at the doorstep of her future, she was being smothered by her bro. She still has issues and is working it out in therapy, but she views her home as her safe haven. She needed that and had lived without it so long.</p><p></p><p>husband and I are closer than we have been in yrs. I was on the verge of divorce and since difficult child is no longer here it is wonderful.</p><p></p><p></p><p>I didn't realize the severity of the destruction difficult child was causing within our home.</p><p></p><p>I almost allowed him to destroy our family. We all were right at our breaking points.</p><p></p><p>I only feel those shameful feelings ocassionally now, like the graduation. I have learned to hold my head up and continue on. I have a wonderful husband that has stood by me in my darkest hours. I have a wonderful easy child that will graduate next yr and begin her journey in life. We all love difficult child and pray for change but we all know that it is his decision to make to change</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearthope, post: 47299, member: 2389"] Barbara your post reminds me of the journey. I am working, the school calls and tells me your son left campus. He didn't sneak off, she was standing there telling him to go to class and he continued to walk off. There was disbelief. How could MY son act this way? Shame. They must think I am a horrible mother. Then it became a never ending process. Each agency I sought out for help, I had to start at the beginning and recount all the terrible things my son had done. Then I was questioned about each response I made when he did these things. I remember each time saying to myself this is not my fault. I am going to be strong this time. I did the best I could. I remember being knocked down each time and feeling like a worthless mom that ruined her child. After so much exposure of raw nerves, it is a wonder I survived. I have also had the chance to see the other side now. My easy child is at the doorstep of her future, she was being smothered by her bro. She still has issues and is working it out in therapy, but she views her home as her safe haven. She needed that and had lived without it so long. husband and I are closer than we have been in yrs. I was on the verge of divorce and since difficult child is no longer here it is wonderful. I didn't realize the severity of the destruction difficult child was causing within our home. I almost allowed him to destroy our family. We all were right at our breaking points. I only feel those shameful feelings ocassionally now, like the graduation. I have learned to hold my head up and continue on. I have a wonderful husband that has stood by me in my darkest hours. I have a wonderful easy child that will graduate next yr and begin her journey in life. We all love difficult child and pray for change but we all know that it is his decision to make to change [/QUOTE]
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