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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 623128" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>I don't usually post in this forum because sadly I'm over in SA and it's sometimes so overwhelming it's hard to get out and about but I wanted to first thank RE for her compassionate and thoughtful responses to all of us who come here for support and all of the members for your unwavering support of each other.</p><p></p><p>I was recently reminded of some of my early days here when I was in the throws of young difficult child behavior that only got worse as she got older. There was a great deal of discussion about attachment disorder, remember that MWM? It was not one of my shining moments here as I was stubborn and convinced that my difficult child was suffering from this and MWM was just as convinced that she could not be because we adopted her at birth. I wasted far too many hours trying to prove my point and not feeling good about any of it. Looking back now and having the advantage of years behind me, I realize how foolish that all was and counterproductive to my own moving forward and "detaching" if you will from her behavior. Which by the way was another of my stubborn positions. I use to say I could no more detach from her than cut off my arm. How foolish. Years later I have been able to detach from her difficult child behavior and stop feeling responsible or that I had to fix it. The meaning behind that word was so different years later.</p><p></p><p>This is a round about way of saying that I finally realized it didn't matter what I or anyone else called it. I grew and my thinking evolved and I saw MWM do the same. I am grateful this board was here throughout my many years of growing and accepting and learning from everyone here and teaching me that I don't always have to be right, that everyone's experience makes them who they are.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 623128, member: 59"] I don't usually post in this forum because sadly I'm over in SA and it's sometimes so overwhelming it's hard to get out and about but I wanted to first thank RE for her compassionate and thoughtful responses to all of us who come here for support and all of the members for your unwavering support of each other. I was recently reminded of some of my early days here when I was in the throws of young difficult child behavior that only got worse as she got older. There was a great deal of discussion about attachment disorder, remember that MWM? It was not one of my shining moments here as I was stubborn and convinced that my difficult child was suffering from this and MWM was just as convinced that she could not be because we adopted her at birth. I wasted far too many hours trying to prove my point and not feeling good about any of it. Looking back now and having the advantage of years behind me, I realize how foolish that all was and counterproductive to my own moving forward and "detaching" if you will from her behavior. Which by the way was another of my stubborn positions. I use to say I could no more detach from her than cut off my arm. How foolish. Years later I have been able to detach from her difficult child behavior and stop feeling responsible or that I had to fix it. The meaning behind that word was so different years later. This is a round about way of saying that I finally realized it didn't matter what I or anyone else called it. I grew and my thinking evolved and I saw MWM do the same. I am grateful this board was here throughout my many years of growing and accepting and learning from everyone here and teaching me that I don't always have to be right, that everyone's experience makes them who they are. [/QUOTE]
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