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butterflydreams
Guest
No advice. Just wanted to offer you a hug and emotional support.
Christy
Christy
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bran155
Guest
Thank you guys for all of the support!!
She called me a little while ago and the call was pretty nice. She is now in LOVE with another inmate whom she met in the visit room. He is writing me a letter!!! Oh yay!! She had him try to call me but I wouldn't accept the charges. She says he is such a good guy, he tells her to get her life together, go to school and be good to her family. He has a college degree and has never been in trouble before. He is in jail for something he didn't do, he refused to rat so they charged him with the crime. So she says!!!! She seems to be having a great time in there!!! She is under the impression that she is coming home tomorrow!!! I hope not!!!
Anyway, thanks again. I will post tomorrow after court and let you all know how it goes. I hope everyone is doing okay today.
Shawna
She called me a little while ago and the call was pretty nice. She is now in LOVE with another inmate whom she met in the visit room. He is writing me a letter!!! Oh yay!! She had him try to call me but I wouldn't accept the charges. She says he is such a good guy, he tells her to get her life together, go to school and be good to her family. He has a college degree and has never been in trouble before. He is in jail for something he didn't do, he refused to rat so they charged him with the crime. So she says!!!! She seems to be having a great time in there!!! She is under the impression that she is coming home tomorrow!!! I hope not!!!
Anyway, thanks again. I will post tomorrow after court and let you all know how it goes. I hope everyone is doing okay today.
Shawna
Wow, what a catch she has found in that jail! I'm sure you are ready to greet him with open arms.
She reminds me a lot of how my dtr used to be. But she has changed and she would not have changed had I not quit "helping" her. She has to learn everything the hard way and on her own terms but she actually does seem to be learning. In her case her baby seems to have been what she needed (not that I recommend that for your dtr)!
You are doing great, you even have a sense of humor about it, that will help you a lot!
Hugs,
Jane
She reminds me a lot of how my dtr used to be. But she has changed and she would not have changed had I not quit "helping" her. She has to learn everything the hard way and on her own terms but she actually does seem to be learning. In her case her baby seems to have been what she needed (not that I recommend that for your dtr)!
You are doing great, you even have a sense of humor about it, that will help you a lot!
Hugs,
Jane
Star*
call 911........call 911
I'm getting you a bumper for your head......because if I had to slap my head as many times as I think you did? I'd want a cushion.
Gosh YES by all means - he didn't do it, he "CARES" about her.....GOOOOOOD GRIEF........AND she GAVE him YOUR address? OMG I would move. I swear I'm laughing with you not at you. OMG.
HOW is it that she's in a place where she can talk to men prisioners? I thought she was in Rikers womens ward. Did I miss a post where she got moved or is it different than it used to be in NY? (I'm so sorry hon - really)
(sends HUGE HUGE bottle of aspirin)
Gosh YES by all means - he didn't do it, he "CARES" about her.....GOOOOOOD GRIEF........AND she GAVE him YOUR address? OMG I would move. I swear I'm laughing with you not at you. OMG.
HOW is it that she's in a place where she can talk to men prisioners? I thought she was in Rikers womens ward. Did I miss a post where she got moved or is it different than it used to be in NY? (I'm so sorry hon - really)
(sends HUGE HUGE bottle of aspirin)
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bran155
Guest
You guys make me laugh!!! lol
Star, she got soooo lucky, because she had a warrant here in Westchester County they transferred her up here before she even saw the outside of Rikers!!! I was really hoping that she would see the inside of Rikers, then maybe she wouldn't be the social butterfly she is right now!!!
She called me again with the BS. "Please mom, enough is enough, I need to get out of here, I want to come home, just call someone and tell them to let me out". I don't know what little world she is living in but I want to call that very same person and tell them I don't want to pay my rent anymore or any bills for that matter!!! lol Where does she think she is? As if we signed her up for a little experiment and now we have changed our minds. She asked me what the judge has been saying to me. Does she mean when we are having lunch together or when we are at the spa getting facials???? LOL
She is entertaining, I'll give her that!!!
Star, she got soooo lucky, because she had a warrant here in Westchester County they transferred her up here before she even saw the outside of Rikers!!! I was really hoping that she would see the inside of Rikers, then maybe she wouldn't be the social butterfly she is right now!!!
She called me again with the BS. "Please mom, enough is enough, I need to get out of here, I want to come home, just call someone and tell them to let me out". I don't know what little world she is living in but I want to call that very same person and tell them I don't want to pay my rent anymore or any bills for that matter!!! lol Where does she think she is? As if we signed her up for a little experiment and now we have changed our minds. She asked me what the judge has been saying to me. Does she mean when we are having lunch together or when we are at the spa getting facials???? LOL
She is entertaining, I'll give her that!!!
compassion
Member
Bran, There is HOPE but she is so very ill. A lot like my difficult child. I just got a call from her attorney's office. difficult child's jail tour is scheduled for Feb. 24. I don't think the "scared straight" thing works for her. She is so very ill but without our intervention she would have ended up there this summer. I get discouraged but really hope stbilizastion will happen sooner rather than later. Compassion
Compassionrejectedmom
New Member
It is so hard when our kid ends up in jail. The initial worry about how they will survive it and what will happen to them when they get out and whether it is enough of a deterrant to them to get their act together can be overwhelming. The thing is we have no control over any of it.. NONE, ZIP, NADA. So as a mom who has been there done that, I suggest that you only go to visit when YOU feel like it. When the visit becomes unpleasant you leave immediately (same with the phone calls) Let her know exactly what the rules will be if you plan on taking her back home and when/if she doesn't obey kick her out. It is all so hard but it is necessary. You did the best you could she is rebelling against both you and society and her own limitations. But she is not channeling it into constructive avenues. Bottom line, you have no control over her or the legal consequences of her actions.
Pray for the ability to love her even when she is unlovable. Enjoy the pleasant times when they are happening and do not dwell on the unpleasant. And take good care of you and the other members of the family. It is hard at first but try to enjoy life in spite of what is going on with your difficult child. difficult child's in general hate not being the center of attention. If you go on and make a new life where she is not the main focus and show her that bad behavior gets NO attention from you, maybe just maybe she will start to exhibit more good behavior.-RM
Pray for the ability to love her even when she is unlovable. Enjoy the pleasant times when they are happening and do not dwell on the unpleasant. And take good care of you and the other members of the family. It is hard at first but try to enjoy life in spite of what is going on with your difficult child. difficult child's in general hate not being the center of attention. If you go on and make a new life where she is not the main focus and show her that bad behavior gets NO attention from you, maybe just maybe she will start to exhibit more good behavior.-RM
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bran155
Guest
Thanks guys.
Compassion, thank you for your support. I have been posting on your thread. I am so sorry your daughter is not doing well.
Jane, thanks for the encouragement. I have to find humor in my daughter's craziness or I'll fall apart!!!
RM, You are so right about praying for the ability to love her when she is unloveable!!! I love her but most of the time I don't like her much!!! The sad part is when she is behaving "normally" she is a hoot, has a good personality and a great heart. I do try to enjoy those moments.
Thanks again my friends, your support really does keep me strong!!
Compassion, thank you for your support. I have been posting on your thread. I am so sorry your daughter is not doing well.
Jane, thanks for the encouragement. I have to find humor in my daughter's craziness or I'll fall apart!!!
RM, You are so right about praying for the ability to love her when she is unloveable!!! I love her but most of the time I don't like her much!!! The sad part is when she is behaving "normally" she is a hoot, has a good personality and a great heart. I do try to enjoy those moments.
Thanks again my friends, your support really does keep me strong!!
