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AIC
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Please if anyone has any advice... I'm talking about a family member, she's 6 yrs old. We adopted her and her 3 siblings because the state took parental rights from her mother. All of the kids have problems- add and adhd was the first we were told, followed by fetal alcohol sydrome. They're all in therapy but (as some may know) a lot of therapists just want to diagnose the easiest thing and throw medications at it. But something is different with this girl. No discipline works- nothing. She lies like there's no tomorrow. She'll beat on her younger siblings then just stare at you. Sometimes she'll just give you a smirk when she does it, sometimes she'll just give you the most evil look you've ever seen because you've scolded her. I have children, I've worked with children, but I've never seen one so deceptive, manipulative, and with complete disregard for every living thing besides herself. The other day she let the family dog out of the house- when the entire family went frantically chasing the dog she locked everyone out of the house. Then she just stood there looking through the window as we were yelling at her to open it. I've tried countless times to talk to her, explaining to her that the things she's doing is hurting people. Nothing I'm saying seems to register, it's like I'm speaking another language. What makes it so confusing is she's very smart, so I figure she's got to understand that the things she's doing are wrong. I was just finally given medical papers from when the state took her as a baby, and I found out that both mother and father have been diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder. In our family, we definately have our share of mental disorders, but I've never seen anything like this. It sounds cruel but it's like the "emotional light switch" in her is turned off. And her way of getting by is to lie, manipulate, and con to get what she wants. She rarely says sorry for anything- and I've notiiced when she does it's only because there's something that she wants at that very moment and that seems to be the reason for her sudden apology. I understand all kids have self-involved and selfish attitudes sometimes but let's face it, you'll always be able to see that they have emotions and feelings in there too. From day one I can't remember one time seeing any true feelings, except for anger and frustration. She fakes sweetness all the time and I can tell when she's doing it because she'll break into her "baby talk" and try to speak very sweet- then within the minute she's asking for something, and within 2 minutes she's doing something wrong again. I don't know what to do to help her. She's close to being kicked out of school, punishment doesn't help a bit, talking to her goes no where. What do you think?? I've accepted that with fetal alcohol being an issue these kids will always struggle and I've accepted that, I can accept this too. I just need to know if there's anything that helps.