Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Should I Be Miffed??
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 70117" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>My mother in law is similar - would rather die than go to a nursing home, or even a retirement village. And she would, too. So the compromise was to move her near to us. sister in law lives on the other side of the country - that's saying something, with Australia. I know mother in law would love her to move back here with us, but sister in law's kids are settled over there and sister in law's husband moved her to Perth in the first place, to get her away from family. mother in law tolerates him. At best.</p><p></p><p>I do a lot of the running around, but at least I'm available. We do have back-ups in place such as home help (which I get myself) as well as community transport assistance so she CAN get herself to appointments without me, if needed. As a War Widow, she gets free assistance with medical transport.</p><p></p><p>Your brother in law sounds like a total jerk. He also sounds like he can't cope - as you said, they did it for a year and then chose to up stakes and leave. Selfish git. Frankly, you're better off without them, because if they really feel like that and they stayed, you might be in your first week at a new job and get a phone call from him asking you to pick up mother in law because he was playing golf instead (or whatever). At least you know where you stand, BEFORE you try to find a job.</p><p></p><p>As you said, she's not going to be with you for much longer. I'd try to find a FLEXIBLE job, or wait. And if husband complains or nags you about finding a job - ask him if HE will be on deck for his mother, to avoid you jeopardising a new job by having to take off too much time at too little notice.</p><p></p><p>husband & I used to take turns to take time off to mind the kids when they were sick. It seemed only fair. We tried to share the load equally. So if your husband wants you out there working, then HE has to step up to the plate - or failing that, acknowledge that you have been doing one heck of a job, with little recognition.</p><p></p><p>You can stand up for yourself without seeming to be selfish or seeming to be helping only reluctantly.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 70117, member: 1991"] My mother in law is similar - would rather die than go to a nursing home, or even a retirement village. And she would, too. So the compromise was to move her near to us. sister in law lives on the other side of the country - that's saying something, with Australia. I know mother in law would love her to move back here with us, but sister in law's kids are settled over there and sister in law's husband moved her to Perth in the first place, to get her away from family. mother in law tolerates him. At best. I do a lot of the running around, but at least I'm available. We do have back-ups in place such as home help (which I get myself) as well as community transport assistance so she CAN get herself to appointments without me, if needed. As a War Widow, she gets free assistance with medical transport. Your brother in law sounds like a total jerk. He also sounds like he can't cope - as you said, they did it for a year and then chose to up stakes and leave. Selfish git. Frankly, you're better off without them, because if they really feel like that and they stayed, you might be in your first week at a new job and get a phone call from him asking you to pick up mother in law because he was playing golf instead (or whatever). At least you know where you stand, BEFORE you try to find a job. As you said, she's not going to be with you for much longer. I'd try to find a FLEXIBLE job, or wait. And if husband complains or nags you about finding a job - ask him if HE will be on deck for his mother, to avoid you jeopardising a new job by having to take off too much time at too little notice. husband & I used to take turns to take time off to mind the kids when they were sick. It seemed only fair. We tried to share the load equally. So if your husband wants you out there working, then HE has to step up to the plate - or failing that, acknowledge that you have been doing one heck of a job, with little recognition. You can stand up for yourself without seeming to be selfish or seeming to be helping only reluctantly. Marg [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Should I Be Miffed??
Top