[h=2]I originally posted this in substance abuse, but would also like to hear from those of you who have their difficult child's over 18[/h]I just found this forum and am so thankful. I have been on the phone/internet searching for resources to help with my son. S*!t hit the fan this morning, although things had been escalating for some time now. I came home yesterday to him and his buddy hanging out in the living room with a bong sitting there. I confiscated it and called his friends mom to come get him and I explained why. My son left even though he had a scheduled tutoring session for his SAT's, which I am paying alot of $ for and considering I'm a single mom, I really can't afford, but he desperately wants to go to college and play football. He is an amazing athlete and is very bright, he was a GATE student in elementary /middle school, but has lost all motivation begining his Freshman year when my Ex-Fiance and I broke up. He has never known his father, I kept him away due to his drug addcition and in/out of jail. I began a relationship when my son was 10, and this man took on the father role in his life. I stayed in the relationship 5 years even though I was unhappy, but their relationship was special I couldn't stand to tear it apart. I finally ended it and the few issues I had with my difficult child soon became major physical outbursts, assaults, and destroying of property in the house. Like I said, things have been escalating and now I am at a breaking point. He is a Senior and I've let it go too far. After the break up, my EX did stay in his life consistently that first year, but then he began a new relationship and soon my son was no longer a priority and he made plans only to fail to show up, call, or even apologize. That has gone on for 2 years now. My son is devastated by this and sometimes refuses to take his calls anymore. Ironically, this is exactly what I was trying to protect him from by keeping his real father away. Back to today, difficult child did not want to wake up to go to school on time today, he was out late last night smoking pot as he does every night before he goes to sleep. I was angry and yelling and got in his face as he was still curled up in bed. He lunged out of bed threw me into the closet then put me into a choke hold and pinned me on the bed by my throat. He let me go and I left, called the police and when they arrived we entered my home and found it completely destroyed. I had the option of having him arrested for battery, but I decided against it. They would've held him for 3 days. He's never been in trouble with the law. They escorted him to school. Shouls I have had him arrested? The only thing he cares about is football and I know that wouldve been stripped from him and I'm afraid that if that's gone he'll completely give up. Some say I've done too much for him. I was a teen mom and vowed I'd never put him through what my mother put me through and I have given in to doing everything for him. Sorry this is so lengthy, but I feel there are so many sides to our situation. thank you all for listening.