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So Annoyed.....
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<blockquote data-quote="dstc_99" data-source="post: 636678" data-attributes="member: 15473"><p>Bennieb,</p><p>That is an awesome decision. Your inlaws know what you did and they know you will not be happy about the situation. There is nothing wrong with distancing yourself from difficult situations. But guess what sometimes your actions speak louder than words. Your inlaws actions say that they don't value the work you have done to help them, or the time you spent, and they don't value your opinion. If you show up and put on your happy face then everyone else wins. You are now in the place of pretending that your feelings don't matter and difficult child is in a place of power. He now knows you will come to family events to please the inlaws and that has a way to keep his contact with you.</p><p> </p><p>I am currently distancing myself from family as well. My family doesn't understand it at all. Their actions tell me they don't respect me or my parenting so I don't feel the need to respect their family traditions. If they need me they can call me but I no longer feel the need to make awkward phone calls or sit through awkward events. Of course it helps that I live on the opposite side of the country.</p><p> </p><p>Honestly though I think you should talk with them and let them know that you wont be attending because you are uncomfortable with the situation. It is the adult thing to do. But I would keep it short and sweet. If they try to guilt you end the call.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dstc_99, post: 636678, member: 15473"] Bennieb, That is an awesome decision. Your inlaws know what you did and they know you will not be happy about the situation. There is nothing wrong with distancing yourself from difficult situations. But guess what sometimes your actions speak louder than words. Your inlaws actions say that they don't value the work you have done to help them, or the time you spent, and they don't value your opinion. If you show up and put on your happy face then everyone else wins. You are now in the place of pretending that your feelings don't matter and difficult child is in a place of power. He now knows you will come to family events to please the inlaws and that has a way to keep his contact with you. I am currently distancing myself from family as well. My family doesn't understand it at all. Their actions tell me they don't respect me or my parenting so I don't feel the need to respect their family traditions. If they need me they can call me but I no longer feel the need to make awkward phone calls or sit through awkward events. Of course it helps that I live on the opposite side of the country. Honestly though I think you should talk with them and let them know that you wont be attending because you are uncomfortable with the situation. It is the adult thing to do. But I would keep it short and sweet. If they try to guilt you end the call. [/QUOTE]
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