so confused about her wetting bed?????

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jena, Feb 15, 2008.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member


    i'm so confused about one particular behavior my difficult child who will be 9 next week wetting the bed. now i know i have her evaluation coming up next week and all, which is great. yet this bed wetting thing has me looped for years.

    we dont' have a nice big house with washer/dryer we have 3 bedroom split level with one bathroom. need i say more??

    so everynight now she wets the bed every night. i go through can't even tell ou the amt. of sheets and blankets in one week not to mention running to laundromat every other night i have the protective sheet only one of them but it needs to be washed as well.

    she's been on chlonidine at night most nights now icna't handle being up till 2 and 3 a.m. with her. she goes to sleep wiht some problems and anxiety but she goes down. usually only lasts from 10 p.m. till 3 a.m. then she's up again with me. so i get a few hours so does she. yet every night now she's wetting bed.

    when she was on all the difff. me'ds last year and part of this year no wetting bed with seroquel, abilify, all the other antipsychoctic's. now with no medication's she's wetting bed again. it's not a medical problem i've checked it out.

    yet this has been going on for about 4 years now since her behaviors became more prevelant with her getting older. there seems to be no rhyme or reason to it i cna't connect it to certain nights, anxiety levels nothing. it used to be once in while well about once a week now it's every single night with the chlonidine which we didn't experience last time she was on chlodine but she was also on seroquel during day.

    it's driving me a bit batty to be honest. mon. and wed. we hvae 5 kids in house we need the comforters those are usually the nights while he's cooking dinner i'm running out to laundromat. unneeded stress.

    what do you think????????????

    she wont' wear any type of pull ups she is incredibly embarrassed by alot of her behaviors and big time with this one.
  2. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Jennifer, bedwetting is never the child's fault. It could be the medications. For the years my son was assumed to be bipolar, he was on Lithium/Seroquel. He wet every single night on it and never again after he was weaned off. I also had a son who was normal who bedwet until he was 12. It was just an immature bladder. We didn't make a big deal of it. I knew he was embarassed. I washed the sheets and he took a shower before school. Your child is on a lot of medications. I'm not a doctor, just a parent, but my limit for medications for my kid was two. But I know all kids are different. Hey, I know about small homes. My house is like a trailer with an upstairs and basement and we have one bathroom too.
    Hon, it's not easy with our kids, but you're doing a good job. You care, you post all the time. The evaluation is coming up. Hang on, we're here for you.
  3. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member

    All my kids wet the bed longer than normal. Oldest did it the longest. I think he quite around 12 too. We just kept the sheets on and did alot of laundry. They didnt have pull ups back then.

    Maybe she would wear those new boxer type ones they have out that dont look like a diaper at all. They come in blue and pink.

    I also bought some of those heavy washable chux and then some of the disposable ones. I kept them under his regular sheets to save the beds.
  4. Jena

    Jena New Member

    she's not on anything now. she has been on several different ones because one didn't work we tried another. thing is she didn't wet the bed while on the medication's now she's off and doing it every night.

    so how did you even organize yourself with it?? when your working during the day it kinda adds up the dirty blankets sheets and all.

    i dont' think she's choosing to wet at all she is so embarrassed by it and i feel bad fo rher all the time. it's just mon - fri can get interesting......with the pajamas and sheets and blankets.........

    anyway just wondering if anyone else goes thru that and how it is they even organize themselves to get thru the week.........

    thanks for your kind words i appreciate it...
  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I didn't work, so that helped. My son who wet until he was 12 had to help. He carried the sheets downstairs and put them in the washing machine, all without condemnation or even a lot of talk. I turned on the washing machine and threw it in the dryer when I had time. He eventually stopped (thank goodness).
  6. Jena

    Jena New Member

    ok so too funny everyone was right i am sick. went to doctor today had to get chest x ray lungs are filled with fluid and junk looks like pnuemonnia.

    called the ex to see if he could cover my cute little bed wetter for weekend and he said no way it's valentine's weekend we have plans...........(love him)

    so anyway not sure how to slow down though. i'm sure the job thing going local will help alot. just went to get my medicine's and bought huge big black garbage bags the beginning of my organizing the pee situation lol

    tha'Tourette's Syndrome the thing if i hop train get home at 7 there are the blankets all wet and grose so i have to run out to wash them.

    i've been begging him for washer, yet we're cramped as it is. he said ok where would we put it?? maybe hang it from ceiling???

  7. 'Chelle

    'Chelle Active Member

    I would try convince her to wear the pullups. They look a lot more like underwear now than they used to. Would it convince her if you slanted it more that SHE will feel better, rather than waking up all wet with pee all over her, it would stay in the pullups. That it's not her fault and this will help her sleep and feel better.

    We have a small older house. We had to get an "apartment" size washer and drier. They take a smaller load, but are convenient for size etc. I can wash about 4-5 pairs of adult jeans in it, and it will take a double size comforter, but not the queen. I do say my dream is to have one of the new kind that will wash up to 15 pairs of jeans and cut my laundry in 1/3, but oh well. Having a small one is better than none. You might check into getting a smaller one if your place is small. They cost about the same as a regular size one tho (BLAH) since they don't sell as many, but it's hard with kids to have to run out to do laundry.
  8. Nightaura

    Nightaura New Member

    I had a bedwetter and we got the book "Dry all Night." I can't remember the author. It gives the kids tools to use to control their bladder and expand it. It really helped our wetter.

    As for the bed, ok, this may be gross and not help during the winter, but urine is actually sterile and you CAN just air dry the sheets a couple times before washing if you have trouble getting to a washer. If it smells, you can get a cat urine deodorizing spray and get the smell out.

    And they do make small washers and dryers as well as stackable ones to fit in smaller spaces. They make ones that roll over to the sink if you lack the hookups as well.

    Good luck.
  9. slsh

    slsh member since 1999


    I can't help with the bed wetting issue other than suggest you talk to psychiatrist about it. The clonidine may just be knocking her out so deeply that she doesn't wake up.

    Soiled sheet issues? I'm an *expert* on that!!! :rofl: Oldest is incontinent, adult diapers are virtually worthless in terms of absorbency, plus he's tube fed at night. We're talking flood city around here. I've never heard of anyone actually wearing out sheets, but we did for years from having to wash them daily.

    You know those chux they use in the hospital? Disposable pads that have plastic on one side and are kinda quilted paper on the other side? Well, they make them out of fabric, with plastic on one side and a nice soft quilted cloth cover on the other, plus the fabric ones come with flaps to tuck in under the mattress on either side. They're probably 3 feet long and as wide as a twin mattress. Best thing since sliced bread. I bought 2 a couple of years ago and just wash one a day. They've probably saved me a fortune in sheets and mattress covers and are reasonably priced (I think I paid at most $15/apiece). Do a google on reusable underpads flaps, or reusable bedpads flaps.
  10. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It


    My heart aches for her. And for your back. It is no wonder you have pneumonia with all you are doing.

    Would she wear the pullups if YOU wore those disposable underwear they make for women during their periods? Just for a short time for you, until she sees that she really IS more comfortable??

    The medications may have been messing with her sleep so that now when she sleeps she is so soundly asleep she doesn't register the need to get up? I am just throwing out ideas here, so I may be way out in left field.

    Has she seen a pediatric urologist? They might have solutions.

    Is it more embarrassing to wake up with a wet bed with all the kids around, or to wear the pull ups?

    Would the adult Depends type things be more comfortable? Not sure how big she is. The serenity ones are very soft (Had to see a specialist about a year ago and had a nasty virus - doctor was 80 miles away, and I had a sample from WalMart) and were very comfy.

    Would she use the pads for bladder problems? Maybe tell the other kids she had her period? Just to make HER feel better??

    The pads Sue described sound like a great idea. Here is an Amazon search list for "reusable underpads flaps" :

    Maybe this will help.

    I just HATE to see you so sick and her so miserable and embarrassed.


  11. Jena

    Jena New Member

    hi guys

    thanks so much............i survived the night i rented a movie and laid with her and she actually stayed still for little while. this weekend will be long. she's alot more hyped up now without the medications'. some days are hyped some are down. we're on a hyped up one now

    so............good news i talked to her about hte whole bed wetting issue, she kept saying i'm so sorry mommy. i said nope no need i just want to help you be comfortable at night took a stab at the pull up but i said their plastic underwear........hmmmm she liked that idea.

    so tomorrow if i can make it out it's depends all the way.

    see thing is she gets up at 3 a.m. every night now like clockwork i'm up with her covered in pee. she's pretty cool about it now and kinda cute goes in bathroom wipes down changes clothes leaves pee clothes on carpet then she wakes me to assist her with sleep again.

    so the kids never see her wet because it's the 3 a.m. call every night. i feel like i have an infant again somehow. memories of 3 a.m. feedings and all.

    anyway yup did the urologist thing her bladder's good i'Tourette's Syndrome emotional.

    thanks for link by the way very cool.

    so so happy i tripped over two huge garbage bags filled with pee stuff and yes i bought the mattress covers for bed and i wash them daily as well. you'd think they'd be plastic on both sides. so so happy we're in depends mode now. the only thing she asked was to hide them away from other kids so they won't find out.

    ok she's up again...........i should of given her chlonidine i didn't to give it to her to give tonight Occupational Therapist (OT) give her drug break since no school tmrw.

    so stupid of me

    thanks again
  12. tammyjh

    tammyjh New Member

    Is the wetting just a nighttime thing? My difficult child has a problem with wetting but for her, its during the day and its gotten worse as she's gotten older. It seems she has little to no muscle control when she laughs and as she thinks everything and anything is funny, she's wet quite a lot. She's to start therapy in March with someone who works with people who have problems with being incontinent. I'm hoping it its a muscle problem. We're avoiding all kinds of medications right now as she's medication free and we don't want any unwanted side effects.

    If you can, I would try to convince her to wear the pull ups or good nights to bed. If I had to run to the laundry mat often and she wet every night, its probably something I would consider a non negotiable and battle it out with her. I know, no fun and if its not a battle you want to engage, its your decision. Good luck and I hope the dr. visit/evaluation goes well.
  13. Snowie

    Snowie New Member

    My 9 yo is a bedwetter, but he never really got out of night nappies, so he just migrated from nappies to night pull ups and wearing them has never really been an issue.

    As far as the linen goes, because he wears the pulls ups, I only have to wash his linen once a week or so but I only have to wash the sheets because under the sheet I have a plastic sheet. I get those cheap plastic table cloths from the $2 shop and cut them in half and it fits the bed nicely. They don't need to be washed, you can just wipe them down and when they get ratty, you just throw them and replace them with a new one.