so he emailed me

[busywend]

I would not let 2 weeks go with my child thinking and wondering if I was alive or dead. I just couldn't.

I do not think you can say his last response is 'bad' necessarily.

I would not bother with anything but, "It was nice to hear you missed me. That made me feel good. Love you son."

 

[Elsieshaye]

Thanks, Everyone. I haven't responded yet, and am not planning to. What I may start doing is creating opportunities for him to interact with me positively, like post pictures of the cat on FB (my friends love me enough to tolerate some cat photos, lol) or other similarly innocuous things. I don't feel comfortable asking him anything directly, because he tends to feel interrogated at the best of times, but it might be a way to build a bridge. I typically don't post on FB at all, so this will give us some opportunities to just be on neutral ground with each other.

@ busywend: Not at all sure how to take your comment. I don't think he sits around and wonders if I'm alive or dead, honestly. He may sit around and wonder why I'm not chasing after him, but I don't believe he thinks about me, per se, at all except in relation to him. (That's not bad or good - I didn't think about my parents as people until I was 30 or so, so I wouldn't expect it of him at this point.) I know he's ok because I see FB proof-of-life postings. Again, not sure what your intent was.

 

[busywend]

Just tried to put myself in the position you are in and what I would do. No ill intent - it is all good. Just what I was thinking is all. My difficult child often wondered if I loved her, so that is why I would feel the need to reassure her - and she always thought I was in a ditch somewhere - worried alot.

I hope that clarifies, I was not meaning anything by it.

 

[DammitJanet]

My kids tend to catastrophize my whereabouts too. That may be because of my health issues and the fact that at one point I did turn up almost dead...lol. If they cant reach me for more than a few hours, everyone is sending out search parties. That is one reason we all have gps of each other on our phones so we can see where everyone else is at any given moment.

 

[Elsieshaye]

Thanks, busywend. I was being defensive, I'm sorry. In a way, it's good that your difficult child worried about you like that. It's still all about her, but it shows you that you are very important in her universe.