F
flutterbee
Guest
I'm not ready to say I'm depressed, but I'm definitely melancholy. I was up all night...just feeling sad, needing some kind of connection that I can't even articulate, let alone find.
I'm beginning to feel like I'm never going to get my life back. So, the physical health stuff is being dealt with, but I just feel beaten down. Before the event, I had SIGNIFICANT cognitive dulling. While it's much better now (read: I don't get lost in my own neighborhood anymore :slap: ), I'm not back to normal. My attention span is short. My memory is awful...I lose whole days. I can't concentrate. Things that used to be second nature now require deliberate thought. I've searched and haven't been able to find a single thing regarding CAD and cognitive dulling (except as related to bypass surgery which I didn't have). I see my regular doctor tomorrow and I'm going to discuss it with her. If I remember. :crazy:
To top it off, I had a falling out with my closest friend 2 weeks ago. I don't get close to people easily at all. She was the only person I had that I even came close to sharing things with. There are other people that I associate with, but it's different. And, no, there is no fixing the friendship.
I'm beginning to feel like giving up or giving in and that is just not me. I've had enough. I don't want anymore. I'm tired of fighting. I quit. I need a break.
On the plus side, my kids have been wonderful. They have helped me in so many ways.
Thanks for letting me whine. I just needed to get it out.
I'm beginning to feel like I'm never going to get my life back. So, the physical health stuff is being dealt with, but I just feel beaten down. Before the event, I had SIGNIFICANT cognitive dulling. While it's much better now (read: I don't get lost in my own neighborhood anymore :slap: ), I'm not back to normal. My attention span is short. My memory is awful...I lose whole days. I can't concentrate. Things that used to be second nature now require deliberate thought. I've searched and haven't been able to find a single thing regarding CAD and cognitive dulling (except as related to bypass surgery which I didn't have). I see my regular doctor tomorrow and I'm going to discuss it with her. If I remember. :crazy:
To top it off, I had a falling out with my closest friend 2 weeks ago. I don't get close to people easily at all. She was the only person I had that I even came close to sharing things with. There are other people that I associate with, but it's different. And, no, there is no fixing the friendship.
I'm beginning to feel like giving up or giving in and that is just not me. I've had enough. I don't want anymore. I'm tired of fighting. I quit. I need a break.
On the plus side, my kids have been wonderful. They have helped me in so many ways.
Thanks for letting me whine. I just needed to get it out.