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Parent Emeritus
So much for a happy new year. This is no way to start.
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 705497" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>Argh... now it's 1 and I haven't done anything. Can't get enough talking done with Jabber to make a decision so told our son to just go to the shelter and we'd call him tonight. When he mentioned his slimy socks that he can't change because he has none, I pointed out if we were buying him a ticket, he'd be coming home in slimy socks tomorrow...so what's the difference.</p><p></p><p>As one might expect...he'd like the money so he can just go shopping and replace his pack, sleeping bag, socks, knife, etc. Jabber says NO on money...and really, so would I with no consideration at all...just NO...but the fact is, my son is <em>right</em> when he says that he can get everything cheaper than we can buy it on-line and as he's the one who'll be using the stuff, he can pick it out himself and know he's getting what he needs. I'm too frugal and practical to not see the sense in letting him get it when he can do so easier and cheaper. This is a hard decision for me. It seems to be easier for Jabber...to just say NO. I don't think he sees it as a practical matte, but more of a matter of principle.</p><p></p><p>In the end...my son DID seem to understand why, if he pushed the issue, he'd get a ticket home and no money or goods; why we have no reason to trust him to do the right thing. He said "but I have literally nothing. Of course I'm going to replace my gear." and I told him..."And we have no proof at all that you have had your stuff stolen." He said, "Wow. That's harsh." Harsh or not, he did agree that it was fair given how many times he's lied to us in the past.</p><p></p><p>To be 100% honest with myself, I'd rather just send him the damn cost of the train ticket and be done with it. I'm TIRED of it all. Jabber is afraid that I'll get a call in 3 weeks and he'll be begging for more again and I'll cave. I won't. I honestly won't. I'm just DONE with it all.</p><p></p><p>And I truly don't want him home.</p><p></p><p>Just an afterthought, he made some offhand remark about what I'd do in his place (pertaining to buying gear to replace the stolen is what he meant.) I said, "What I'd do? Do you really want to know what I'd do if I were a healthy 21 year old man who was homeless?" He didn't really want to know. Probably a good thing because I'd have told him to get his butt to the nearest Airforce recruiter and join the military.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 705497, member: 17309"] Argh... now it's 1 and I haven't done anything. Can't get enough talking done with Jabber to make a decision so told our son to just go to the shelter and we'd call him tonight. When he mentioned his slimy socks that he can't change because he has none, I pointed out if we were buying him a ticket, he'd be coming home in slimy socks tomorrow...so what's the difference. As one might expect...he'd like the money so he can just go shopping and replace his pack, sleeping bag, socks, knife, etc. Jabber says NO on money...and really, so would I with no consideration at all...just NO...but the fact is, my son is [I]right[/I] when he says that he can get everything cheaper than we can buy it on-line and as he's the one who'll be using the stuff, he can pick it out himself and know he's getting what he needs. I'm too frugal and practical to not see the sense in letting him get it when he can do so easier and cheaper. This is a hard decision for me. It seems to be easier for Jabber...to just say NO. I don't think he sees it as a practical matte, but more of a matter of principle. In the end...my son DID seem to understand why, if he pushed the issue, he'd get a ticket home and no money or goods; why we have no reason to trust him to do the right thing. He said "but I have literally nothing. Of course I'm going to replace my gear." and I told him..."And we have no proof at all that you have had your stuff stolen." He said, "Wow. That's harsh." Harsh or not, he did agree that it was fair given how many times he's lied to us in the past. To be 100% honest with myself, I'd rather just send him the damn cost of the train ticket and be done with it. I'm TIRED of it all. Jabber is afraid that I'll get a call in 3 weeks and he'll be begging for more again and I'll cave. I won't. I honestly won't. I'm just DONE with it all. And I truly don't want him home. Just an afterthought, he made some offhand remark about what I'd do in his place (pertaining to buying gear to replace the stolen is what he meant.) I said, "What I'd do? Do you really want to know what I'd do if I were a healthy 21 year old man who was homeless?" He didn't really want to know. Probably a good thing because I'd have told him to get his butt to the nearest Airforce recruiter and join the military. [/QUOTE]
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So much for a happy new year. This is no way to start.
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