I feel good tonight. It's good to watch Nichole as she matures. She has quite a way to go, but she is getting there and it gives me huge hopes for her future. Nichole and I "girl talked" for more than 2 hrs tonight. I can't believe it. This was just us girls talking about all sorts of issues. Talking and listening going on. Just like when easy child and I do it. Frankly, it was awesome. We discussed alot of stuff. Child support, she and boyfriend have been notified state is going to be taking care of it, so boyfriend will be paying. boyfriend's reaction. Me wanting Nichole to try her hand at independence before she and boyfriend decide to live together and the why's of it. With some family stories Nichole hadn't been privy to due to lack of maturity as examples as to why it would be a good idea to gain more self confidence and independence before the whole move in thing. We discussed a bit on their relationship. Seems boyfriend thinks I hate him. *chuckle* And he's terrified of me since the time I really blew up at him. I know it probably comes across that way here as I'm usually ticked at him when I post, but actually he's an ok kid. It's their volitile relatonship that drives me nuts. boyfriend has alot of maturing to do, in many ways Nichole has pulled way ahead of him in that area. I did tell her that I worry about how they relate to each other and why. She listened. Really listened. We also went over the whole deal with boyfriend's Mom. I guess she's been "moody" (to put it nicely) and some ugly things have happened. Nichole would get so mad at me cuz I'd tell her it was her house whenever she'd whine to me. lol So we went over Respect, and how if she and his Mom remain at war the odds of their relationship making it aren't very high as boyfriend really does love his mother and always will. boyfriend's Mom is a drama queen to the max and has some issues that took me about 5 mins to spot. I think it's being made worse by menopause and the fact boyfriend, Nichole, and the baby spend the majority of their time under foot. And I told Nichole so, how I would/did feel when they did that here, ect. And his parent's marriage is in trouble which is adding additional stress. Of course she's not gonna be Miss Sweetness and Light all of the time. I won't bore you with all of it. But it was really nice to talk to her like 2 grown ups instead of as Mom to daughter, if you know what I mean. Many things I said were very blunt and honest. In the past I shudder at what her reaction would have been. It most certainly wouldn't have been to listen and consider what I had to say or my point of view. Now the amazing part of it is that Nichole has been unmedicated for several months. I didn't know about it until it was a done deal. (I wasn't thrilled) Nichole is as stable, if not more so, off the medications as she was on the medications. The only time I'm seeing mood shifts is in relationship to food, and eating the right food pulls her out of it. The Borderline (BPD) issues are still there, much improved with practice on her part, but there are no medications to really treat that anyway. So for now I'm left wondering about the bipolar diagnosis being accurate, and if it wasn't the blood sugar Borderline (BPD) combo we were taking as bipolar. I do think we were dealing with serious depression for quite awhile but I'm wondering if it wasn't "circumstantial" due to something that I believe (and she denied, but I found the letter to boyfriend telling him about it) took place at that same time frame. I suppose time will tell. I don't think Nichole would bulk if I thought she needed medications again. Like I said, she has quite a ways to go with the maturity thing. But she seems to be doing well with it. Although there are still issues, some normal for age, some she's still catching up with peers, some Borderline (BPD) related, I am still seeing steady progress which is encouraging. But it was so cool. It wasn't really so long ago I could not imagine myself having such grown up "girl talk" with Nichole.