Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Some of the basics?
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="so ready to live" data-source="post: 704652" data-attributes="member: 20054"><p>Hi Go slow. No platitudes, no musings. I believe the best things we did was to look at our physical space, our time and OUR lives as a whole. For our home, we changed the locks-best $ spent ever. We made it known to our son that he needed to call before he came (doesn't always work but it's better) Now, to that calling. We mostly don't answer. Sounds awful, I know, but for us, totally necessary for our sanity. No calls ever answered during work hours, he can leave voicemail if an emergency. 99% of the time he doesn't. We turn phones off or block him after 9pm. This has helped so much with the middle of the night drunken rants and stupid questions. </p><p>We came to the conclusion that if we really were not going to help anymore---then he needed to figure it out at 2am. WE have our own lives. </p><p></p><p>Think, if you can, about what your peaceful life would look like. Don't frame it around your child/adult, ie. "if he would function, I would be happy..."</p><p>You did the best you could, we all did. The detaching really just gets better in increments. Each day that you put a little more separation there, you become more you. This also allows him to become more him--maybe right now not a him you like... He's asked you by his actions to move on, let him. Protect you. </p><p>You are stronger than you think. Prayers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="so ready to live, post: 704652, member: 20054"] Hi Go slow. No platitudes, no musings. I believe the best things we did was to look at our physical space, our time and OUR lives as a whole. For our home, we changed the locks-best $ spent ever. We made it known to our son that he needed to call before he came (doesn't always work but it's better) Now, to that calling. We mostly don't answer. Sounds awful, I know, but for us, totally necessary for our sanity. No calls ever answered during work hours, he can leave voicemail if an emergency. 99% of the time he doesn't. We turn phones off or block him after 9pm. This has helped so much with the middle of the night drunken rants and stupid questions. We came to the conclusion that if we really were not going to help anymore---then he needed to figure it out at 2am. WE have our own lives. Think, if you can, about what your peaceful life would look like. Don't frame it around your child/adult, ie. "if he would function, I would be happy..." You did the best you could, we all did. The detaching really just gets better in increments. Each day that you put a little more separation there, you become more you. This also allows him to become more him--maybe right now not a him you like... He's asked you by his actions to move on, let him. Protect you. You are stronger than you think. Prayers. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Some of the basics?
Top