Something is up

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by Nancy, Feb 25, 2012.

  1. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    So I saw a couple pictures on facebook of this dog and her in her car and I texted to ask her if she adopted it. It's a rescue dog in the animal clinic she works in and she keeps saying she wants it. We pointed out she has a cat and her roommate has two cats and she does not have money to care for a dog and she works 11 hour days and wants to go to school. I should save my breath because she will take it if she hasn't already. She will be homeless and living in her car with a cat and dog at some point.

    So I asked her what she was doing and she said driving around. Then she told me she went to see Barb, her IOP counselor. Of course I asked why and she said just to talk. difficult child does not go see someone just to talk. So I asked her what was wrong and she said nothing and I asked of she was drinking and she said no and then I asked if she got kicked out of her apartment and she said no. But her roommate had a fundraiser tonight for a sober house she helped open and difficult child was suppose to go and didn't.

    Soooooooo I guess I will have to just wait and see when she will tell us what is really up and in the meantime try not to worry too much.

  2. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Hi Nancy, I hope it turns out that it was really nothing to worry about. What is an IOP counselor?

  3. toughlovin

    toughlovin Guest

    Oh Nancy i hope this is your natural worrying from past experience and that it is just her gfgdom and not a sign she is drinking again!

  4. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Intensive outpatient program.

    Pretty sure she got kicked out of her apartment and yes she has the dog. Pit bull.

  5. AmericanGirl

    AmericanGirl Guest

    Waiting stinks. It is like knowing either a tornado fire or flood....or a bad coming in the next two weeks. You don't know which or when...but you feel the rumble.

    Hoping for a hangnail in your case.
  6. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Full grown Pit or a puppy? I have a feeling you will be inheriting a dog soon. If it is a puppy, or even grown, dont worry too awfully much. I have a full grown one that is a big baby. In fact, we think she is autistic. For over a year I was the only one she would let get near her. Not that she would bite or growl at anyone, she would just hide. She was a scaredy cat. It took tony over a year with her outside with him alone and me staying inside when they were out together for her to come to trust him. Now she loves us both but she is still attached to me more. If I am around, she is my shadow. She wouldnt know how to bite anyone but we do need to get her nails clipped. She scratches me all the time without meaning to because she is just so excited to be with us when we let her in the house. She is so funny because we can tell her PEN Nina...and she will run to her pen at a full gallop. But her pen is falling apart now so she gets out all the time and I will hear her scratching at my front door late at night and have to let her in...sigh. She loves that. Our little 5 pound havenese rules her with an iron fist. He bites her and draws blood on HER! LOL. she has no clue that she could bite back and make a snack out of him. She has the softest mouth when we feed her treats. She will just take them out of our fingers by basically just licking them out. No teeth at all. Definitely not a biter. As far as protection, I just better hope someone sees her and thinks...oh no Pit...lmao.
  7. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    No Janet I will not be inheriting a dog and we told her that weeks ago she just does what she wants irregardless of the consequences.

    She's been kicked out and as far as I can tell she's living in her car.

    I'm with Kathy, I'm so over this. They can stop drinking but it doesn't change who they are. I don't have much hope anymore.

  8. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I know around the world there are famous huge rollercoasters that patrons seek out. in my humble opinion our CD rollercoaster ride has to top them all. Just whn you think you're on an even segment your gut tells you here comes another drop....and then you don't know how darn steep it is. I understand getting sick of it. Hoping there will be upward movement again soon but oh so sorry that your confidence is undermined. Again. Hugs. DDD
  9. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Geez Louise. Not to add to your anguish but I just remembered that her employment goal is working with animals. Talk about shooting yourself in the foot. Can't you imagine how impressed the vet staff will be that she has a dog with no home, no space and likely no shots? Guess the next thing we'll read is that Kathy's difficult child has chopped her hair off and dyed it blue for her interviews in the beauty salons.

    It's mindboggling. DDD
  10. exhausted

    exhausted Active Member

    Nancy, I'm so sorry. The common sense gene is the first to get destroyed when they start drinking and using. It just seems that the world has to really bite them for learning to take place. I really hope she finds a place and keeps her job-she has at least been successful there. ((Hugs))
  11. Signorina

    Signorina Guest

    Oh Nancy, I am sorry and I hope that this turns out to be a blip and not a big drop. I hate the feeling of waiting for the other shoe to fall and please know I am thinking of you. {{hugs}}
  12. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    OMG. What is she thinking? Did she get kicked out because of the dog or is it something else?
  13. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Sorry Nancy. Is she "fostering" the dog for the clinic? I hope she comes to her senses, it would not be good for her job there if she does not act in the best interest of the dog. Sorry for the new developments. Really a bummer.
  14. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I think the dog was the last straw because her roommate posted last week that she was facing conditions that she would like to change and letting go of people we wish were different. I suspect difficult child has been drinking and this dog situation was the thing that did it.

    I checked her email and she has been looking for apartments that take dogs and they are really scummy apartments in bad areas. I guess having a pit bull will come in handy. And that sure puts a stop to any thought of taking classes.

    No buddy it's hers. She as been saying she was going to take it as soon as our governor signed the law that says pit bulls are not considered a dangerous breed. I guess she thinks that means apartments have to allow them. She is the most oblivious person I have ever met. She has been saying she is getting a pit bull for years just because she knows what most perople's reaction is. Like my husband said, she will always live on the edge....always.

  15. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I understand "oblivious" but doesn't she still have the job at the clinic? Doesn't she have to be at work tomorrow? Is it possible that she truly can't put two and two together that she is choosing the pit bull over her long avowed career goal?

    Usually I "get" that our difficult child's don't "get it" but this one is mindblowing. Seems like it was just a week or two ago that she inquired about being promoted at the clinic. Sad to say....I think it has to be her addictions back in full swing.

    No matter what it is......I truly am sorry. Hugs DDD
  16. Kathy813

    Kathy813 Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Did she finally admit to being kicked out of the apartment? I don't even know what to say. She can't go back to a sober house with animals, can she?

  17. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    Nancy, not that difficult child will listen, but the law doesn't take affect until 90 days after signing. And, just because they are off the list, individual cities can still keep their own rules. Not sure where you are, but some cities and counties in northeast ohio have super strict laws about pitties. (being in rescue I know all the area laws) I hope she manages to get her act together, and keeps her job.
  18. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    StressedMomma thanks for the info and yes we tried to point that out to her. She currently lives in a city (NE Ohio west side near the lake) that does not allow pit bulls and she thought the law would mean they have to allow them. I guess she doesn't understand that apartments and cities can set whatever rules they want and most do not allow pit bulls.

    She hasn't admitted anything to us but we have enough evidence to piece it all together. Her phone calls to apartments, her comments and pics on fb, the fact that she is no longer talking to any of her sober support group friends either on text or fb, and will not answer our texts. Of course she will not be able to keep her job if she has no place to live.

    DDD this is the reason why I am so worried every time she calls us. Every time things are going well for her she self sabotages. She can't ever live happy, always has to be causing or looking for some drama. She has attached herself to this dog and won't give it up, even at the expense of her home and job. And if she isn't full blown back into addiction she is headed there.

    Last edited: Feb 26, 2012
  19. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    husband just talked to her and yes she is moving out. Claims she "wants her own place and is sick of having a roommate and sick of having to ask if she can have her friends over." Claims she didn't take the dog yet but is going to when she gets her own place and is going to look at a couple today. That's a lie. She doesn't know what she will do for furniture and was goign to ask us for some of the things we have in the basement.

    I wash my hands. She barely makes enough to pay the $450 rent she pays now with no utilities. She can't be sober and even if she is it won't be for long.

  20. exhausted

    exhausted Active Member

    They are so good at snatching defeat right out of the jaws of victory! Self sabotage-yep! Doesn't that tell us they still don't love themselves?