Mattsmom277
Active Member
I posted a couple times about my sister in law (my s/o's sister) who has a really bad addiction to oxycontin and percocet. The one who was in a car wreck, got it back from the shop ( several thousand in repairs) and crashed it again 5 days later (this time totally it, less than a year old, nice SUV).
Anyhow, she was supposedly "off the stuff". We knew better. Smiled and nodded. We tried to be there for her, we tried to support her husband and help him stop enabling. We really like her husband. We feel horrid for her kids. The entire situation is a mess, but we decided it was HER mess and backed away from her. We had to. She was making our days so toxic.
So, we've barely seen her. She knows S/O isn't being given income while he's off classes for the summer, so we get a call. She is finally moving 5 hours away to where her husband is living for the past year at another military base. The military pays someone several hundred dollars to do some basic cleaning of the base housing they've been rented. It needs to be done and inspected before they release the funds for the cost of their move. So she asks my s/o, knowing he'd do a good job and needs the $$$. So he does it. All that was left was helping his brother in law to take some stuff to the dump in a trailer. This wasn't part of the job the base pays for, this was just family helping family stuff. They were to meet early one day last week, do the dump run, then meet the military base guy to get the inspection signed off on, at which point my S/O gets paid. So they don't show up to pick him up. So he takes a bus. There is nobody there. He comes home. We hear nothing all that day and they were living in a hotel and leaving the next morning for their new city. That night I get a call from my brother.
This is where reality and fiction merge, only it is all to real life for our liking. So, my brother lives in a complex of townhouses. My drugged out sister in law has a friend there, her dealer/supplier and a junkie I've known since high school. In a weird twist of this-town-is-too-gosh-darn-small, my brother used to date this junkie as a teen (she wasn't a junkie then). She moved in 5 doors away from my brother only a month or so ago.
Anyhow, my brother calls that night to say that my sister in law was over at this womans house and saw my brother outside. And in talking to my sister in law, he is told that my S/O totally messed them all up by not doing what he said he'd do, not being around to do the work etc. Well, he HAD done the work. 2 full days worth. And a evening helping just as a family member with stuff for my brother in law. My brother knew that, so he called to see if we'd heard from my sister in law. Nope.
So I told my S/O that his dear sister was saying he hadn't shown up to work etc. He knew right away what I stupidly was blind to. That she had taken the money for the job he did, and told her husband she would come pay my S/O, but went down to her "friends/dealers" house to stock up on pills with the money before the big move. ARGH!
I wasn't happy. I left a message on their hotel answering machine just saying that how stupid is she to say something like that to MY BROTHER and ABOut her OWN brother who worked his butt off and helped beyond what he was to be paid for. Told her that we knew she had taken him for a ride on the money but that my S/O wanted her to know that he wasn't suprised and that the money aside, he just thinks she's pathetic and when she's in town next to visit her daughter, to not stop here to visit because he is done done done with her and her games. I was pretty ticked off, I can't believe I said that but did it in a composed fashion, no yelling or swearing (when I cheerfully would have tore a strip off her if I could have got away with it, I don't take kindly to people bashing my S/O who is a terrific guy).
So she called here, I refused to answer. After the 3rd call, S/O had a brief talk to her, wasn't too nice, hung up. She turned up here the next morning and tried to come in to say goodbye on their way out of town. He didn't let them in, told her we had nothing to say to her but did sarcastically tell her to "Drive safe! Or better yet, have husband drive!!!". She was in tears, going on about how he isn't the type to talk to her like that, and he just laughed and told her that she managed to push him more than anyone else ever has. She left.
So last night my phone rings. My brother is calling. He is chuckling and tells me that he was calling because he thought I might be interested in knowing that he was informed by our mother that I am addicted to oxycontin and percocet! I nearly choked!
In another twist of I-gotta-move-far-far-away, my mother ALSO lives in the same complex as my brother, and this junkie woman/friend/dealer of my sister in law's. So this junkie loser knows my mother since we did hang out over 20 years ago in high school. Guess they were talking, and in doing my sister in law's bidding, this twit told my mother that it was ME with a drug probem.
Now most of you know by now my mother didn't raise me, she is bipolar but gosh knows what else. She's the most manipulative, hateful, toxic and cruel person I've ever known. We have no communication. Which is good.
So she delighted in relaying a conversation this woman had with her, which my brother called to tell me about. So now I also have my mother calling up everyone we know, asking for their help to "intervene" because her daughter (me) who won't speak to her (I'm soooo evil for that!) is a *gasp* ADDICT.
If it wasn't so ironic and funny, I'd be infuriated.
Thought some of you might relate to the life that is ours, when surrounded by difficult child's!!!
(On a light note, my difficult child thinks this is hilarious and keeps coming into a room saying Mom! Quit hitting that pipe! and cracking up. So its the new inside joke in the family)
Anyhow, she was supposedly "off the stuff". We knew better. Smiled and nodded. We tried to be there for her, we tried to support her husband and help him stop enabling. We really like her husband. We feel horrid for her kids. The entire situation is a mess, but we decided it was HER mess and backed away from her. We had to. She was making our days so toxic.
So, we've barely seen her. She knows S/O isn't being given income while he's off classes for the summer, so we get a call. She is finally moving 5 hours away to where her husband is living for the past year at another military base. The military pays someone several hundred dollars to do some basic cleaning of the base housing they've been rented. It needs to be done and inspected before they release the funds for the cost of their move. So she asks my s/o, knowing he'd do a good job and needs the $$$. So he does it. All that was left was helping his brother in law to take some stuff to the dump in a trailer. This wasn't part of the job the base pays for, this was just family helping family stuff. They were to meet early one day last week, do the dump run, then meet the military base guy to get the inspection signed off on, at which point my S/O gets paid. So they don't show up to pick him up. So he takes a bus. There is nobody there. He comes home. We hear nothing all that day and they were living in a hotel and leaving the next morning for their new city. That night I get a call from my brother.
This is where reality and fiction merge, only it is all to real life for our liking. So, my brother lives in a complex of townhouses. My drugged out sister in law has a friend there, her dealer/supplier and a junkie I've known since high school. In a weird twist of this-town-is-too-gosh-darn-small, my brother used to date this junkie as a teen (she wasn't a junkie then). She moved in 5 doors away from my brother only a month or so ago.
Anyhow, my brother calls that night to say that my sister in law was over at this womans house and saw my brother outside. And in talking to my sister in law, he is told that my S/O totally messed them all up by not doing what he said he'd do, not being around to do the work etc. Well, he HAD done the work. 2 full days worth. And a evening helping just as a family member with stuff for my brother in law. My brother knew that, so he called to see if we'd heard from my sister in law. Nope.
So I told my S/O that his dear sister was saying he hadn't shown up to work etc. He knew right away what I stupidly was blind to. That she had taken the money for the job he did, and told her husband she would come pay my S/O, but went down to her "friends/dealers" house to stock up on pills with the money before the big move. ARGH!
I wasn't happy. I left a message on their hotel answering machine just saying that how stupid is she to say something like that to MY BROTHER and ABOut her OWN brother who worked his butt off and helped beyond what he was to be paid for. Told her that we knew she had taken him for a ride on the money but that my S/O wanted her to know that he wasn't suprised and that the money aside, he just thinks she's pathetic and when she's in town next to visit her daughter, to not stop here to visit because he is done done done with her and her games. I was pretty ticked off, I can't believe I said that but did it in a composed fashion, no yelling or swearing (when I cheerfully would have tore a strip off her if I could have got away with it, I don't take kindly to people bashing my S/O who is a terrific guy).
So she called here, I refused to answer. After the 3rd call, S/O had a brief talk to her, wasn't too nice, hung up. She turned up here the next morning and tried to come in to say goodbye on their way out of town. He didn't let them in, told her we had nothing to say to her but did sarcastically tell her to "Drive safe! Or better yet, have husband drive!!!". She was in tears, going on about how he isn't the type to talk to her like that, and he just laughed and told her that she managed to push him more than anyone else ever has. She left.
So last night my phone rings. My brother is calling. He is chuckling and tells me that he was calling because he thought I might be interested in knowing that he was informed by our mother that I am addicted to oxycontin and percocet! I nearly choked!
In another twist of I-gotta-move-far-far-away, my mother ALSO lives in the same complex as my brother, and this junkie woman/friend/dealer of my sister in law's. So this junkie loser knows my mother since we did hang out over 20 years ago in high school. Guess they were talking, and in doing my sister in law's bidding, this twit told my mother that it was ME with a drug probem.
Now most of you know by now my mother didn't raise me, she is bipolar but gosh knows what else. She's the most manipulative, hateful, toxic and cruel person I've ever known. We have no communication. Which is good.
So she delighted in relaying a conversation this woman had with her, which my brother called to tell me about. So now I also have my mother calling up everyone we know, asking for their help to "intervene" because her daughter (me) who won't speak to her (I'm soooo evil for that!) is a *gasp* ADDICT.
If it wasn't so ironic and funny, I'd be infuriated.
Thought some of you might relate to the life that is ours, when surrounded by difficult child's!!!
(On a light note, my difficult child thinks this is hilarious and keeps coming into a room saying Mom! Quit hitting that pipe! and cracking up. So its the new inside joke in the family)