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Son arrested
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<blockquote data-quote="bluebell" data-source="post: 708082" data-attributes="member: 16761"><p>Thank you Copa! We have put my son in facilities when he was underage but I do believe that none of this will help until he seeks care and I'm not interested in mandating care for him if it isn't wanted. Son knows when we kicked him out a few weeks ago that to come back he goes to rehab - first thing. I have it all set up ready to go, sponsor part of the application, pre certified insurance, copay in savings, etc. If he wants to go, then he will go. Also, since he is violent I am not in a mood to get into an adversarial position with him. Hate to quote Dr. Phil, but he says we must pick our battles, but the ones we pick we must WIN. And frankly, the private program he would go to voluntarily is ten times better than any program the court would mandate (but won't based on a misdemeanor). </p><p></p><p>My dad is a worry wart who operates on fear and has always encouraged me to throw money at my son in an attempt to fix this. I did that for a while. But I'm out of money and time off for him now. My dad is in the beginning stages of dementia, so he cannot go to any appointments, but he never did and he's always been this way. Doesn't explain any of it, but it does mean it's time for me to stop burdening him with this, and I have for the most part. I just mentioned the arrest because I thought it was something to say when he asked 'How is grandson doing?' I'm not a good liar but I must start trying the 'lie by omission' thing a little harder. My mother died when I was young and we were very close so I think I try to replicate that relationship with my father. Not working.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="bluebell, post: 708082, member: 16761"] Thank you Copa! We have put my son in facilities when he was underage but I do believe that none of this will help until he seeks care and I'm not interested in mandating care for him if it isn't wanted. Son knows when we kicked him out a few weeks ago that to come back he goes to rehab - first thing. I have it all set up ready to go, sponsor part of the application, pre certified insurance, copay in savings, etc. If he wants to go, then he will go. Also, since he is violent I am not in a mood to get into an adversarial position with him. Hate to quote Dr. Phil, but he says we must pick our battles, but the ones we pick we must WIN. And frankly, the private program he would go to voluntarily is ten times better than any program the court would mandate (but won't based on a misdemeanor). My dad is a worry wart who operates on fear and has always encouraged me to throw money at my son in an attempt to fix this. I did that for a while. But I'm out of money and time off for him now. My dad is in the beginning stages of dementia, so he cannot go to any appointments, but he never did and he's always been this way. Doesn't explain any of it, but it does mean it's time for me to stop burdening him with this, and I have for the most part. I just mentioned the arrest because I thought it was something to say when he asked 'How is grandson doing?' I'm not a good liar but I must start trying the 'lie by omission' thing a little harder. My mother died when I was young and we were very close so I think I try to replicate that relationship with my father. Not working. [/QUOTE]
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