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Substance Abuse
Son homeless again
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<blockquote data-quote="JayPee" data-source="post: 760764" data-attributes="member: 23405"><p>My heart goes out to you. We've all been there and in a lot of ways, I'm still there. The things that I try to keep working on amongst a lot of other things are:</p><p>1. Your son and you are not the same person. Put a period after yourself. Know he is separate from you. He has his own lungs, heart beat, will and mind.</p><p>2. Don't let the guilt you have from things you may have done wrong while bringing him up and/or other "injustices" he endured throughout his life ,make you feel like you have to make up to them for it. You did the best you did at the time with the knowledge you had.</p><p>3. It's not our responsibility to feel their pain or take it away as it isn't theirs to take ours away.</p><p>4. I love both my sons dearly, but most often the angst I feel is my own discomfort over their situations. I agree with others, try to get into therapy and also get to an Al anon meeting where you'll learn to focus on yourself, little by little, and change the things about you that are "sick" from dealing with an addict your whole life. </p><p>5. Pray, pray and pray some more for your son and YOU. I always forgot to pray for myself and still have to be reminded to do so. You are just as important as your son is. Treat yourself with the same compassion as you give your son.</p><p></p><p>Remember, you are not your son's savior. He has one just like you do.</p><p></p><p>I write these things not just as a reminder for you, but just as much for myself. It's a slippery slope and you have to feed yourself inwardly with the things that will make you strong. Just like putting the right foods into our bodies make us stronger, so doesn't putting the right thoughts into our minds make us well. If we can make ourselves sick but the thoughts we think, we can also make ourselves well, by them too.</p><p></p><p>Sending hugs.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="JayPee, post: 760764, member: 23405"] My heart goes out to you. We've all been there and in a lot of ways, I'm still there. The things that I try to keep working on amongst a lot of other things are: 1. Your son and you are not the same person. Put a period after yourself. Know he is separate from you. He has his own lungs, heart beat, will and mind. 2. Don't let the guilt you have from things you may have done wrong while bringing him up and/or other "injustices" he endured throughout his life ,make you feel like you have to make up to them for it. You did the best you did at the time with the knowledge you had. 3. It's not our responsibility to feel their pain or take it away as it isn't theirs to take ours away. 4. I love both my sons dearly, but most often the angst I feel is my own discomfort over their situations. I agree with others, try to get into therapy and also get to an Al anon meeting where you'll learn to focus on yourself, little by little, and change the things about you that are "sick" from dealing with an addict your whole life. 5. Pray, pray and pray some more for your son and YOU. I always forgot to pray for myself and still have to be reminded to do so. You are just as important as your son is. Treat yourself with the same compassion as you give your son. Remember, you are not your son's savior. He has one just like you do. I write these things not just as a reminder for you, but just as much for myself. It's a slippery slope and you have to feed yourself inwardly with the things that will make you strong. Just like putting the right foods into our bodies make us stronger, so doesn't putting the right thoughts into our minds make us well. If we can make ourselves sick but the thoughts we think, we can also make ourselves well, by them too. Sending hugs. [/QUOTE]
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