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Son Signed for Prison Today
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 699107" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I am so pleased for you. What an achievement. And a marvelous career and life in front of you.</p><p></p><p>Your son. It is what it is. You know that. He will do with this what he will. Six years is a good sentence. By that I mean it is enough time to change and to get something done. You and I believe in education. In six years if he wants to he can get a Bachelor's degree. In the prison I just quit there were 3 community colleges that offered courses, two by correspondence, 1 actually paid professors to come in and teach, even laboratory science. I was amazed at this change in climate towards rehabilitation in my state. I have done this for 20 years. I saw it change to get bad, and now better.</p><p></p><p>I hope your son is open to mental health treatment. In my State it has really gotten quite good.</p><p></p><p>Six years (I am being optimistic here. Why not?). Enough time to decide to change and to do it. It is possible. What else does any parent have? The possibility that their child will learn to live well. </p><p></p><p>There is a Rabbi here in my state who with his wife began a residential treatment center for troubled young people. He is an ex-felon. Multiple terms. A drug addict and a thief. Maybe violence, I am not sure. And then he changed. I urged my so to try to go to his program, but my son tells me that they would not consider him because he is mentally ill. I doubt this but what can I say?</p><p></p><p>Let me tell you this so that you do not worry: The first few months are the most difficult due to the adjustment, and because your son will go to a reception center. Depending upon case factors he may be confined many hours a week. That is because he has to be classified. He needs medical and psychological evaluations. His case and record and history need review to determine custody level, that is, how a secure a facility he requires and what needs he may have that need to be addressed such as medical, psychological, sensitive needs, etc. Mail will take longer to get through and opportunity to make phone calls will be less. He may be frightened. Many men are frightened but they may act otherwise. It will be OK. In my state he may be placed in a dorm which means he will be in a locked room with 6 or so men, with a lot of opportunity to go out into a common day room to socialize, watch TV or play cards or games. There are always a group of guys that like Dungeons and Dragons. There are always a few intellectuals. The thing to remember is that this initial period is not typical to the rest of the term which is called mainline here in my state. That is when he can avail himself of a regular program including education, a range of spiritual activities, etc.. Many people from the community visit throughout the week to provide support, but this is available typically through AA or NA or the chapel.</p><p></p><p>In some ways life is simple in prison. Yes or no. There are libraries. There is recreation. He will find men who are simpatico. There are some brilliant and highly creative men in prison. Amazing. It makes me wonder a lot about the whys and the hows. But that I will spare you.</p><p></p><p>He is safe. Prison for him will be a good place. He will grow up. He will decide how he wants to live. It will all of it be on him, just as it is for any other adult. It is all of it out of your control and your responsibility. You know that. Your son knows that. *I have posted more than once that there were years I wished my son would be incarcerated so that he would learn!!! When I told that to a group of prisoners they asked, "aren't there easier ways? What about the military?" I guess that is what unites all of us. There was no easy way.</p><p></p><p>All you can do now is love him. That is all any of us can do I guess.</p><p></p><p>I send you love and hope. I feel he will be OK. Congratulations again for your great achievement.On so many levels.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 699107, member: 18958"] I am so pleased for you. What an achievement. And a marvelous career and life in front of you. Your son. It is what it is. You know that. He will do with this what he will. Six years is a good sentence. By that I mean it is enough time to change and to get something done. You and I believe in education. In six years if he wants to he can get a Bachelor's degree. In the prison I just quit there were 3 community colleges that offered courses, two by correspondence, 1 actually paid professors to come in and teach, even laboratory science. I was amazed at this change in climate towards rehabilitation in my state. I have done this for 20 years. I saw it change to get bad, and now better. I hope your son is open to mental health treatment. In my State it has really gotten quite good. Six years (I am being optimistic here. Why not?). Enough time to decide to change and to do it. It is possible. What else does any parent have? The possibility that their child will learn to live well. There is a Rabbi here in my state who with his wife began a residential treatment center for troubled young people. He is an ex-felon. Multiple terms. A drug addict and a thief. Maybe violence, I am not sure. And then he changed. I urged my so to try to go to his program, but my son tells me that they would not consider him because he is mentally ill. I doubt this but what can I say? Let me tell you this so that you do not worry: The first few months are the most difficult due to the adjustment, and because your son will go to a reception center. Depending upon case factors he may be confined many hours a week. That is because he has to be classified. He needs medical and psychological evaluations. His case and record and history need review to determine custody level, that is, how a secure a facility he requires and what needs he may have that need to be addressed such as medical, psychological, sensitive needs, etc. Mail will take longer to get through and opportunity to make phone calls will be less. He may be frightened. Many men are frightened but they may act otherwise. It will be OK. In my state he may be placed in a dorm which means he will be in a locked room with 6 or so men, with a lot of opportunity to go out into a common day room to socialize, watch TV or play cards or games. There are always a group of guys that like Dungeons and Dragons. There are always a few intellectuals. The thing to remember is that this initial period is not typical to the rest of the term which is called mainline here in my state. That is when he can avail himself of a regular program including education, a range of spiritual activities, etc.. Many people from the community visit throughout the week to provide support, but this is available typically through AA or NA or the chapel. In some ways life is simple in prison. Yes or no. There are libraries. There is recreation. He will find men who are simpatico. There are some brilliant and highly creative men in prison. Amazing. It makes me wonder a lot about the whys and the hows. But that I will spare you. He is safe. Prison for him will be a good place. He will grow up. He will decide how he wants to live. It will all of it be on him, just as it is for any other adult. It is all of it out of your control and your responsibility. You know that. Your son knows that. *I have posted more than once that there were years I wished my son would be incarcerated so that he would learn!!! When I told that to a group of prisoners they asked, "aren't there easier ways? What about the military?" I guess that is what unites all of us. There was no easy way. All you can do now is love him. That is all any of us can do I guess. I send you love and hope. I feel he will be OK. Congratulations again for your great achievement.On so many levels. [/QUOTE]
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