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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 686762" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>Pasa, there is a difference between heartlessness and an unblinking assessment of our situations. I read once about a woman described as having walked those paths she'd chosen with grace, if not pleasure. </p><p></p><p>That is how I see you.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Time will tell, pasa. One day at a time. For today, you are doing your best for him, and for you.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I was never able to determine the purpose in what happened to all of us. Our daughter tells us now that our unwavering presence in her life helped her believe in herself again. During the darkest times we had no guidelines, and felt very lost. It was hard for us to know where that line was between enabling and supporting. We just did the best we knew. We learned to forgive ourselves for not knowing. </p><p></p><p>It was hard to know the words to speak. </p><p></p><p>Anne Lamott writes that there are really only three prayers: "Help!" "Thanks!" and "Wow!" Just in that moment before I spoke any words out loud, I found myself (and I still do) praying that one simple prayer, "Help!"</p><p></p><p>Doing that helped me be my best self, for her and for me, I think.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 686762, member: 17461"] Pasa, there is a difference between heartlessness and an unblinking assessment of our situations. I read once about a woman described as having walked those paths she'd chosen with grace, if not pleasure. That is how I see you. Time will tell, pasa. One day at a time. For today, you are doing your best for him, and for you. I was never able to determine the purpose in what happened to all of us. Our daughter tells us now that our unwavering presence in her life helped her believe in herself again. During the darkest times we had no guidelines, and felt very lost. It was hard for us to know where that line was between enabling and supporting. We just did the best we knew. We learned to forgive ourselves for not knowing. It was hard to know the words to speak. Anne Lamott writes that there are really only three prayers: "Help!" "Thanks!" and "Wow!" Just in that moment before I spoke any words out loud, I found myself (and I still do) praying that one simple prayer, "Help!" Doing that helped me be my best self, for her and for me, I think. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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