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Substance Abuse
Son will be homeless again
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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 762456" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>If I can disengage, you can. My son is homeless. I love my son as much as you love yours. I was a hopeless wreck. What changed is that I realized that I have the capacity to disengage from the blow-by-blow identification with him. It is NOT me who sleeps in some forest. It is him, a distinctly different person with different capacities, tolerances, standards, and wishes. Right now as I type this I am in my bed. I am comfortable and I am safe. I choose to stay in my own body and mind and not do some flight of fancy to join him in his degradation.</p><p></p><p>By allowing yourself to abandon yourself you do him, yourself, and your family no good at all. Al-Anon is one way to learn the tools to restore your own sanity and well-being. I did not go to Al-Anon, but I found a deep faith where I do not even identify with my own suffering most of the time, let alone that of my son.</p><p></p><p>This is doable, Helpless. From what I have heard of your son, he needs to be on his own. This is how he has the potential to learn from life. Life is the best teacher. Mothers are not so good at this.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 762456, member: 18958"] If I can disengage, you can. My son is homeless. I love my son as much as you love yours. I was a hopeless wreck. What changed is that I realized that I have the capacity to disengage from the blow-by-blow identification with him. It is NOT me who sleeps in some forest. It is him, a distinctly different person with different capacities, tolerances, standards, and wishes. Right now as I type this I am in my bed. I am comfortable and I am safe. I choose to stay in my own body and mind and not do some flight of fancy to join him in his degradation. By allowing yourself to abandon yourself you do him, yourself, and your family no good at all. Al-Anon is one way to learn the tools to restore your own sanity and well-being. I did not go to Al-Anon, but I found a deep faith where I do not even identify with my own suffering most of the time, let alone that of my son. This is doable, Helpless. From what I have heard of your son, he needs to be on his own. This is how he has the potential to learn from life. Life is the best teacher. Mothers are not so good at this. [/QUOTE]
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Son will be homeless again
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