Ok girls, I had a discussion (again) with my mom about how do I deal with my dad being mad about his medical exam for his driving license due to his drunk driving. Mom was still in her heck that he is unmanageable, that other than pedagogy extreme measures like I did are against her values... Ok, fine. Then, she talks about dad wanting to help me for housing and that I wanted to destroy everything. WTH ????? She said that I scornful and such. WTH ????? I finally took my big girl panties reminding her that for now, nothing has been done yet, if he helps for housing fine, but otherwise I don't want to expect anything about it. And this is exactly what he did in the past about pocket money or such to beg me not to act on his actions. Conclusion : been there, done that. For the housing, wait and see. If I get it, great, otherwise, I won't ruin my health and sanity for it. I reminded her that the only moment he accepted to handle at least some responsibilities is when I didn't talk to him and stock to it despite his begs and such. I reminded to my mom that she preferred to cover up his own mistakes instead of taking extreme measures and from it, she was enough a coward. And now, "you want me to feel guilty about a help that hasn't been made up ? You want me to give up ? Not even in your craziest dreams !!". She at least accepted to recognize that she participate in his triangulating, which I can be thankful. The first time she recognizes that she played a role in my whole setup to make dad having a medical exam for his driving license. I could slap on her face after that, I would do it. Just to put her brain at her place. I repeated to her like a broken record : been there, done that. I see a therapist I previously had. In France, psychologists are not paid by Social Security, so tdocs are more often than not psychiatrists. Like everywhere, there is the good, the bad and the ugly. I hope that he will accept to see dad with me in order to make him understand that driving after a glass is absolutely not ok, whatever he can beg for. Especially when he looks like he has drunk a glass even without drinking at all, so no need to worsen his problem furthermore. I am the same when not taking my Concerta. Dad falls in the entire category of ADHD despite having always refused to see a specialist and preferring self medicating his symptoms, with his wife "approval" (she somehow approves this behavior, at least for years before she took my diagnosis of ADHD like a slap on her face, as the same time she learns that her son has a dyslexia, as far as I know quite severe). His wife, a .02$ psychologist who probably earned her diploma nowhere else than in a Kinder egg (an Italian expression : Kinder egg is an Italian product. And yes, I speak Italian too) or a pack of cereals, speaks, speaks, speaks, but does not do the slightest thing. My sister does what she can and I am relieved that we are on the same page, even the same letter on the same page. Thanks God !! I also plan to raise this concern to my GP tomorrow (I have to see her again, I am so often sick with all the stress I have to handle. My finger infection got better but still not completely cleared, so I have to see her back. Grrrrrr) and maybe she has some ideas. I could also plan to take an appointment with an approved GP for driving license. I know one I saw about my law fight, but still unsure he would accept to give a lesson to my daddy upon daughter (myself) request. I'm not sure if it's a great idea to make an appointment for that, and I'm not even sure if I can email him for this stuff (he gave me his email address for any stuff about the law I fight about), and because my father can make everything to avoid the appointment. At least, I made buy him the therapist appointment with me. I am quite freaked out, to be honest ++++++ because I don't have many ideas about plan B in case the therapist doesn't accept (he has no obligation to accept to see my father with me, and I can completely understand should he be reluctant to do so). Pfiou, sleepless nights are my worst enemy, as for my ADHD, as for tinnitus, as for everything. I desperately need some support, even if it means no advice. Any spare big girl therapeutic panties to offer me ??