Squeezed... or something

[InsaneCdn]

mother in law, father in law, M, F... all are "old" (way older than our DDD), and needing major care - and one set is in total denial, and the other wants more help than we really have to give...

K1 and K2 are into a stage in life where I wish we lived on a farm and had max time interacting with them... they are pulling everything possible out of us, not a bad thing but draining.

I sort of feel like I'm being eaten alive.

Is that why they call us the "sandwich generation"?

 

[katya02]

That's it, all right ... very draining. Sorry to hear that all four parents/in-laws are in need of significant care at the same time. That's really tough. It does seem to happen right when kids reach particularly demanding stages too. Any hope of in-home help/community health services for the parents/in-laws? Would they accept it? Or do they need a residential situation?

 

[Malika]

Shame you can't live on a farm and have all three generations together... or maybe I have lived too long in France where that sort of thing still happens.

 

[DammitJanet]

All the sandwich generation. It really bites. I started going through it way too young. It is so hard on everyone. With us we really had no one to step in and help us so it was just us and the boys taking care of Tony's grandmother and then my mom. At least when we had to take care of my grandmother, my mom was still alive.

 

[InsaneCdn]

Having all three generations together would be much worse. If we could just get "our" family into that set-up (not happening), we'd be more flexible with our time - and have less money. Hmmm... no easy answers anywhere.

 

[Star*]

What kind of sangwich? Submarine? DIVE DIVE.......
Maybe it would do you good to explain to ALL parties......that WEDNESDAY and SUNDAY are OFF LIMITS.....and if they need anyone call 911......to give you rest so you can dealio the rest of the week?

Hugs

 

[InsaneCdn]

As if difficult child would EVER do that. <grin>

The old folks are not breathing down our necks. But... there's always something that we need to be ahead of them about - trying to get them to think, trying to get them to act... basically, I have 10 difficult children in my life right now. That's a bit much, but nothing's going to change.

I just need 48 hours in a day, or some super-woman pill, or... something. It isn't physically demanding or even heavy time demands. It's just the effort it takes to hold THAT many pieces together. And there is absolutely nobody else on either side of the family who is or can be doing this stuff for the old folks (much less for the rest of us).

(yes, 10 includes the dogs...)

 

[buddy]

Well, you're already as close to Superwoman as can be so I'll get right on that 48hours in a day thing for ya, ok?