Staffing really made me mad--

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by mog, Sep 24, 2010.

  1. mog

    mog Member

    ---well I could not got to this one because of my new job but husband did go. No one has being going to the meetings except husband and myself since he moved to this new place--so why now that I could not be is everyone there. husband told me that one in charge of the staffing made it out to look like he had been having a lot of new issues going on when in fact it was just a summary of everything all other. Now the one in charge of the JPO department (who has it out for difficult child anyway) decided that they want him to stay and complete phase 4. When last staffing we were told that he only had to complete phase 3 and would be out in Oct. We all got excited thinking that he would be close to home for his 18th birthday. He is upset and rightly so and wants use to go see him but I have NOOOOO money, my hours suck at this new job, my car is still broke down-me and husband are carpooling. I haven't bought groceries in months -we r just making it up as we go with what we have in the freezer and cabinets. It breaks my heart that I can't go see him since he finally wants me around. More so that he is hurting and I am so dam far away.
    --Side bar 1 -our oldest daughter has been down at the hospital with her boyfriend for the last 2 weeks -days and night -literally living in the hospital while my mom takes care of their baby -10 month old (my sister helps when she gets off work). It was totally his fault -he is an idiot-was drunk and threw a case of cokes at someone eating and he had a knife and when he reacted he accidentally stabbed him in the neck. I feel that she should be at home taking care of her baby -the boyfriend -baby daddy- is 26 and should be old enough to understand that she can't be there but he wants her there to take care of him --that is what the nurses are for. The whole stupid fight started because she did not take him his dinner fast enough. UGH!!
    --Side bar 2 --youngest daughter is mad because I ruined her surprise with her boyfriend. She came up last weekend. I always ask all of the kids to tell me when they are leaving so in case something happens we know where to look and how much time to give them--well she did not and when I called her -no answer-when i text her no answer waited an hour then did it again so I finally text the boyfriend to find out what time she left but he did not know she was coming so now she is being a pain an not talking to me at all. I feel like turning off her phone. Then she signed up for skype when she doesn't even use the web-cam I bought her to talk to me.
    Rough Week --so glad it is over
  2. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member


    Sorry it's been such a tough week. Listen, you can't change how youngest daughter feels or thinks - so do your best to let that go. Girls can definitely be moody!

    Oldest daughter kinda made her bed with this guy - it's unfortunate that she is placing deadbeat ahead of her own child, but thank goodness your mom and sister selflessly step in. She's lucky, if not using the brain she was given.

    As far as difficult child, this is tough. I wonder if you feel confident enough in the program he is in to trust their judgement on this one? Certainly, as a mother, it would be breaking my heart as well. Naturally he is upset, but isn't this kinda what he needs to learn? Things don't always work out the way we want and very often we are responsible for that happening? Maybe it's better that he's there facing these tough challenges. I know most of our difficult children have that "entitlement complex" that makes it difficult for them to deal with things that don't go their way. I don't know, doesn't make it any easier for you. I know you just want to give him a hug.

    As far as the financial stress, I can't find a positive in that one. Since you and husband have kinda renewed your relationship, go right now and get a big hug. Sometimes holding on to what blessings we have can make our problems a little easier to take.

  3. mog

    mog Member

    Thanks Sharon!!
  4. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Ditto what Sharon said! Adding in my hugs.