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General Parenting
Staffing this morning ... terse email
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 15994" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I think there is a HUGE difference between "blowing off " experts and simply being determined to keep the meeting on track. I have no qualms about stepping in and chairing the meeting (because generally nobody is officially 'in the chair') and saying, "We only have limited time, we need to stay on task - we've already discussed prognosis at length, today's agenda is trialling release to home," or similar. It CAN be done diplomatically, but if you're polite and firm and FEEL authoritative (and they're not expecting it) you can get away with it. Chances are, other people at the meeting who have previously had to sit through psychiatrists & tdocs waffling off subject - they'll thank you.</p><p></p><p>Something that really works for me - I take a laptop computer and take my own minutes of the meeting as we go. I have MY agenda drawn up and tick off each point as we deal with it, as well as note down what othr people said on that topic. If you're taking brief notes you can very quickly recognise when nothing new is said.</p><p>Another trick that can help here - you cut in when you get a chance, respond to (say, psychiatrist) with "So what you're basically saying is this..." and then summarise, in a nutshell, what they've said. And if it's off topic, then ask - "How does this relate to our issue for today?" If you REALLY want to cut things short, you say, "So perhaps this relates to today's agenda by explaining expectations. Thank you for expanding on this - but I think we need to move on to deal with practicalities for today and perhaps revisit your concerns at a later meeting, when we have a better idea of how she is actually responding once back home." </p><p>Then look around the room and immediately choose someone to speak who you KNOW is desperate to get back on topic. Once your eye contact leaves psychiatrist, he's been dismissed, effectively, from continuing. Unless he is VERY determined.</p><p></p><p>Of course, you're only the parent, you have no right to chair the meeting, but if nobody else is you can grab a brief advantage if you really feel the meeting has derailed. The trick is - any authority you're given - grab it and expand on it as if it's your right. Just keep bringing the meeting back on topic. Glance at your watch frequently, if psychiatrist (or any digressor) is about to grab the waffle back again. This empowers others at the meeting to follow your lead.</p><p></p><p>And 'hormonal' never comes into it!</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 15994, member: 1991"] I think there is a HUGE difference between "blowing off " experts and simply being determined to keep the meeting on track. I have no qualms about stepping in and chairing the meeting (because generally nobody is officially 'in the chair') and saying, "We only have limited time, we need to stay on task - we've already discussed prognosis at length, today's agenda is trialling release to home," or similar. It CAN be done diplomatically, but if you're polite and firm and FEEL authoritative (and they're not expecting it) you can get away with it. Chances are, other people at the meeting who have previously had to sit through psychiatrists & tdocs waffling off subject - they'll thank you. Something that really works for me - I take a laptop computer and take my own minutes of the meeting as we go. I have MY agenda drawn up and tick off each point as we deal with it, as well as note down what othr people said on that topic. If you're taking brief notes you can very quickly recognise when nothing new is said. Another trick that can help here - you cut in when you get a chance, respond to (say, psychiatrist) with "So what you're basically saying is this..." and then summarise, in a nutshell, what they've said. And if it's off topic, then ask - "How does this relate to our issue for today?" If you REALLY want to cut things short, you say, "So perhaps this relates to today's agenda by explaining expectations. Thank you for expanding on this - but I think we need to move on to deal with practicalities for today and perhaps revisit your concerns at a later meeting, when we have a better idea of how she is actually responding once back home." Then look around the room and immediately choose someone to speak who you KNOW is desperate to get back on topic. Once your eye contact leaves psychiatrist, he's been dismissed, effectively, from continuing. Unless he is VERY determined. Of course, you're only the parent, you have no right to chair the meeting, but if nobody else is you can grab a brief advantage if you really feel the meeting has derailed. The trick is - any authority you're given - grab it and expand on it as if it's your right. Just keep bringing the meeting back on topic. Glance at your watch frequently, if psychiatrist (or any digressor) is about to grab the waffle back again. This empowers others at the meeting to follow your lead. And 'hormonal' never comes into it! Marg [/QUOTE]
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