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Staying Calm... For Now
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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 636321" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>Welcome, Plexicos.</p><p>He sounds a bit like my son. He would disappear for hours and I would have to scout the neighborhood looking for him. Very embarrassing, to say the least.</p><p>Very, very ADHD, where his thoughts were racing ... well, except the thoughts about responsibility or obedience, which seemed fleeting at best. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p>You have to keep an eye on him at this stage. The hard part was getting an authoritative babysitter, because I was exhausted and needed breaks. He left several in tears, but we did find two very good ones.</p><p></p><p>Definitely, he needs to be tested. Is he on grade level? You could have him given a day of psychoeducational testing. It combines attention span, basic drawing skills (square, circle, triangle which falls partly under motor control and partly brain function), math, English, and social. Maybe your girlfriend would be more comfortable with that. I do not know if it is covered by insurance, but even if you pay cash, it is well worth it.</p><p></p><p>He sounds slightly Aspie to me. Don't use regular punishments. Obviously, they don't work. What are his favorite things to do? Warn him ahead of time what will happen if he does xyz. When he does it, take away whatever it is--TV time for a half hour, etc. Don't do anything for more than a day or two. He's too young to understand. (Regular kids understand better but with-ADHD and other issues, they can't behave for more than a few hours at a time.)</p><p></p><p>When he does something good, even if it's holding open a door for someone, or speaking in a normal tone of voice, praise him. "I really like the way you said that. I like your voice just like that. I wish you would do it more."</p><p></p><p>So sorry about his mom. Sounds like she's the stumbling block. These kinds of things tend to get worse, not better, left untreated.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 636321, member: 3419"] Welcome, Plexicos. He sounds a bit like my son. He would disappear for hours and I would have to scout the neighborhood looking for him. Very embarrassing, to say the least. Very, very ADHD, where his thoughts were racing ... well, except the thoughts about responsibility or obedience, which seemed fleeting at best. :) You have to keep an eye on him at this stage. The hard part was getting an authoritative babysitter, because I was exhausted and needed breaks. He left several in tears, but we did find two very good ones. Definitely, he needs to be tested. Is he on grade level? You could have him given a day of psychoeducational testing. It combines attention span, basic drawing skills (square, circle, triangle which falls partly under motor control and partly brain function), math, English, and social. Maybe your girlfriend would be more comfortable with that. I do not know if it is covered by insurance, but even if you pay cash, it is well worth it. He sounds slightly Aspie to me. Don't use regular punishments. Obviously, they don't work. What are his favorite things to do? Warn him ahead of time what will happen if he does xyz. When he does it, take away whatever it is--TV time for a half hour, etc. Don't do anything for more than a day or two. He's too young to understand. (Regular kids understand better but with-ADHD and other issues, they can't behave for more than a few hours at a time.) When he does something good, even if it's holding open a door for someone, or speaking in a normal tone of voice, praise him. "I really like the way you said that. I like your voice just like that. I wish you would do it more." So sorry about his mom. Sounds like she's the stumbling block. These kinds of things tend to get worse, not better, left untreated. [/QUOTE]
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