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Parent Emeritus
Stealing and lying and whatnot oh my
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 667650" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Welcome Sad Mum, I am so glad you found us here. You will find support and wisdom from the "warrior parents" who have been through it.</p><p></p><p>I am so sorry for what you are going through with your daughter and sadly it's an all too familiar story here on this site.</p><p></p><p></p><p>No, you can't fix this for her. Of course the "mom" in you wants nothing more than to be able to make it all better for her. I know that feeling all too well myself.</p><p>You have done all you can for her. She has to want to make the changes herself for herself.</p><p>The more we try and "help" all we are really doing is enabling and that can cause more harm than good.</p><p></p><p></p><p>I know just how you feel. I was once right where you are with all those feelings right down to the I told you so.</p><p>Know this; You did not cause this and it has no reflection on you. Repeat that to yourself over and over.</p><p></p><p>There is a good article at the top of the Parent Emeritus forum on detachment, it's wonderful and very helpful. Please give it a read.</p><p></p><p>Do you have contact with her via phone calls, Facebook, or some other form of communication?</p><p></p><p>The reason I ask is because that can be a place to start setting boundaries with her. Sending her a clear message that you cannot solve her problems for her.</p><p></p><p>I and many here have found the less we say to our Difficult Child the better. I do not ask my son how he is doing as that only opens the door for him to tell about all the drama and chaos that he surrounds himself with.</p><p></p><p>You are here with us now, you are not alone on this journey.</p><p></p><p>Others will come along and share also.</p><p></p><p>((HUGS)) to you...............</p><p></p><p><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/notalone.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":notalone:" title="notalone :notalone:" data-shortname=":notalone:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 667650, member: 18516"] Welcome Sad Mum, I am so glad you found us here. You will find support and wisdom from the "warrior parents" who have been through it. I am so sorry for what you are going through with your daughter and sadly it's an all too familiar story here on this site. No, you can't fix this for her. Of course the "mom" in you wants nothing more than to be able to make it all better for her. I know that feeling all too well myself. You have done all you can for her. She has to want to make the changes herself for herself. The more we try and "help" all we are really doing is enabling and that can cause more harm than good. I know just how you feel. I was once right where you are with all those feelings right down to the I told you so. Know this; You did not cause this and it has no reflection on you. Repeat that to yourself over and over. There is a good article at the top of the Parent Emeritus forum on detachment, it's wonderful and very helpful. Please give it a read. Do you have contact with her via phone calls, Facebook, or some other form of communication? The reason I ask is because that can be a place to start setting boundaries with her. Sending her a clear message that you cannot solve her problems for her. I and many here have found the less we say to our Difficult Child the better. I do not ask my son how he is doing as that only opens the door for him to tell about all the drama and chaos that he surrounds himself with. You are here with us now, you are not alone on this journey. Others will come along and share also. ((HUGS)) to you............... :notalone: [/QUOTE]
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