It's been over a week since I've heard from difficult child. A friend saw him (in a bar, of course) last Monday. I've tried not to look at his FB, etc. I did well until yesterday. difficult child has closed his twitter account where he publicly praised the benefits of pot, etc. His FB is private but I can see he is friending relatives of relatives along with an old AA sponsor, sober house roommates, etc. He is planning to visit the sober house where he was kicked out in the next month to see someone still there. Interesting that he updated his profile picture but it isn't one of him and bio dad. That's surprising to me. I know that looking isn't good for me and only allows him the chance to hurt me. I have asked two friends to look occasionally and tell me on a 'need to know' basis. I know I control nothing where difficult child is concerned. It's just I need to make sense of what I know so I can stop thinking about it. See if this sounds plausible - difficult child is cleaning up his image while acquiring new victims as well as people from the recovery community. He has steadfastly refused to have contact with a number of these 'new friends' over the years as they have treated him poorly, ignored him since birth or difficult child has blamed them for his troubles. I do not believe for a second he is on the right track. I believe he is setting the stage to take advantage of relatives and then, if that fails, return to one of the sober houses and begs for admission even though he is broke. Based on history, difficult child hasn't been able to hold it together more than 4 straight months before the wheels come off again. In the last years, he has lived in 6 places and had 7 jobs. I re-read my old journal starting with when difficult child first went into rehab early last year. It really helped me see consistent patterns of behavior and reinforced that my decision to stop supporting him was the best one. Funny how once difficult child realized the cash counter was closed, he found all these long-lost people. It appears cold and callous to me. But maybe, in his world, it is normal. I'd have better luck nailing Jello to a tree than getting difficult child on the right track. I know that. But, it's still an adjustment...very much like a death. The difference between this and death is that there is no ending You never know when things may change, if things may change - if there will be better - or worse.