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Strange and awkward
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 623548" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Echo, I am so glad to hear an update from you about what is going on in your life. I hope you had a good trip. I saw one post where I believe you said the trip was mixed. I hope the getaway part was good for you, at the least.</p><p></p><p>I think we must celebrate any trying that occurs. Theirs to get a handle on their lives, and ours to keep on living ours instead of theirs.</p><p></p><p>It's okay to be hopeful,Echo. At a distance, for self-protection. I hope your difficult child finds some answers and can take yet another step forward in his life, whatever that looks like.</p><p></p><p>My difficult child sent me a text on Monday saying he "thinks he has a job." I waited a while, thinking, and then just wrote, congratulations. He wrote back saying, don't get so excited mom, I don't have it yet. I didn't respond. </p><p></p><p>Maybe this is a step forward for him. I don't know. I am continuing to keep my distance. That is best for me right now. </p><p></p><p>I actually have greatly relaxed (for some strange reason, and writing that, it is scary). I am continuing to let it go and I am finding that with infrequent, short contact, I can work better at letting go of the judgment that I bring to his situation. </p><p></p><p>I really want to just accept. what. is. With no expectations, no waiting for the other shoe to drop, no nothing. </p><p></p><p>The harsh cynic in me says, well, it's going on 60 days. He usually can't go beyond 60 days without getting arrested again. Tick, tock. </p><p></p><p>The eternal optimist in me says, he's really, actually trying to get a job. Maybe he will. Maybe because we have all stopped, finally, at the same time, he can do something on his own. </p><p></p><p>The still emerging new-me says, just let it go. It will either work or it won't. Nothing you can do or will do will influence it anyway. He's going on 25. Let him be 25.</p><p></p><p>I am sure that conversation with him took a toll. I think it is very positive that he called to ask and you did your best to tell him the truth. </p><p></p><p>Are you reading Living with Uncertainty by Pema Chodron? Very, very good. </p><p></p><p>Hugs and a good night's sleep to you tonight. Hang in there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 623548, member: 17542"] Echo, I am so glad to hear an update from you about what is going on in your life. I hope you had a good trip. I saw one post where I believe you said the trip was mixed. I hope the getaway part was good for you, at the least. I think we must celebrate any trying that occurs. Theirs to get a handle on their lives, and ours to keep on living ours instead of theirs. It's okay to be hopeful,Echo. At a distance, for self-protection. I hope your difficult child finds some answers and can take yet another step forward in his life, whatever that looks like. My difficult child sent me a text on Monday saying he "thinks he has a job." I waited a while, thinking, and then just wrote, congratulations. He wrote back saying, don't get so excited mom, I don't have it yet. I didn't respond. Maybe this is a step forward for him. I don't know. I am continuing to keep my distance. That is best for me right now. I actually have greatly relaxed (for some strange reason, and writing that, it is scary). I am continuing to let it go and I am finding that with infrequent, short contact, I can work better at letting go of the judgment that I bring to his situation. I really want to just accept. what. is. With no expectations, no waiting for the other shoe to drop, no nothing. The harsh cynic in me says, well, it's going on 60 days. He usually can't go beyond 60 days without getting arrested again. Tick, tock. The eternal optimist in me says, he's really, actually trying to get a job. Maybe he will. Maybe because we have all stopped, finally, at the same time, he can do something on his own. The still emerging new-me says, just let it go. It will either work or it won't. Nothing you can do or will do will influence it anyway. He's going on 25. Let him be 25. I am sure that conversation with him took a toll. I think it is very positive that he called to ask and you did your best to tell him the truth. Are you reading Living with Uncertainty by Pema Chodron? Very, very good. Hugs and a good night's sleep to you tonight. Hang in there. [/QUOTE]
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