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Such a thing as "too" detached?
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<blockquote data-quote="DazedandConfused" data-source="post: 28474" data-attributes="member: 831"><p>Thank you all. That question has been floating in my mind for a while. I dont know, I suppose I thought I might be causing some sort of damage that would affect Daughter later on as an adult. I know it sounds rather silly, but hey, I live with difficult children and my reality is just a TAD warped at times. I needed to do a reality check and make sure Im not over-detaching (if there is such a thing).</p><p></p><p>As for the neighbor, Daughter was very angry. Even deleted her from her friends list on MySpace. Though, Daughter had a consequence for something she did yesterday and got her computer privilege removed for a week. She mentioned this afternoon she wasnt as angry, but still wasnt ready to forgive. I have had numerous conversations with her about this friend (not a very good one, IMNOHO). I have had conversations with her about the family. Basically, they are good people, but have weird issues and do some odd things. However, they have done some things that have hurt Daughter. Still, because of Daughters few friends living so far from us, this is someone she can hang out with that lives close. I always caution her when things look like they are getting a bit chummy. Im polite to friend, but she can sense I dont like her. </p><p></p><p>Im fairly black and white on that issue. You hurt my kid: I dont like you. Nice to my kid: I like you. </p><p></p><p>Daughter does have plans to attend community college, locally, after high school. Then, transferring to a university after two years. So, of course, she can live at home rent-free as long as she is a full time student and is passing her classes. But, if unnecessary drama starts, Ill probably be showing her the door. </p><p></p><p>She and I talk a lot. Shes not one to keep any secrets and I do talk to her about how she might handle things better in the future. Of course, I have to wait until she calms down. Honestly, she has come a long way from when I first came here. I guess I feel the PSTD whenever she starts with the histrionics and I feel the protective wall go up emotionally.</p><p></p><p>Okay, well, I feel better. </p><p></p><p>Again, thank you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DazedandConfused, post: 28474, member: 831"] Thank you all. That question has been floating in my mind for a while. I dont know, I suppose I thought I might be causing some sort of damage that would affect Daughter later on as an adult. I know it sounds rather silly, but hey, I live with difficult children and my reality is just a TAD warped at times. I needed to do a reality check and make sure Im not over-detaching (if there is such a thing). As for the neighbor, Daughter was very angry. Even deleted her from her friends list on MySpace. Though, Daughter had a consequence for something she did yesterday and got her computer privilege removed for a week. She mentioned this afternoon she wasnt as angry, but still wasnt ready to forgive. I have had numerous conversations with her about this friend (not a very good one, IMNOHO). I have had conversations with her about the family. Basically, they are good people, but have weird issues and do some odd things. However, they have done some things that have hurt Daughter. Still, because of Daughters few friends living so far from us, this is someone she can hang out with that lives close. I always caution her when things look like they are getting a bit chummy. Im polite to friend, but she can sense I dont like her. Im fairly black and white on that issue. You hurt my kid: I dont like you. Nice to my kid: I like you. Daughter does have plans to attend community college, locally, after high school. Then, transferring to a university after two years. So, of course, she can live at home rent-free as long as she is a full time student and is passing her classes. But, if unnecessary drama starts, Ill probably be showing her the door. She and I talk a lot. Shes not one to keep any secrets and I do talk to her about how she might handle things better in the future. Of course, I have to wait until she calms down. Honestly, she has come a long way from when I first came here. I guess I feel the PSTD whenever she starts with the histrionics and I feel the protective wall go up emotionally. Okay, well, I feel better. Again, thank you. [/QUOTE]
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Such a thing as "too" detached?
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