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<blockquote data-quote="New Leaf" data-source="post: 683380" data-attributes="member: 19522"><p>Okay, not talking about banning words, just being careful with our responses according to the members posting, and their unique situations, where they are on the path. Also being mindful of what others responses are? JMO.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3">From the guidelines on posting in PE------</span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3">***Offer care, warmth, understanding, possibilities, options and ideas as opposed to a "tone of authority” and “absolute certainty.”</span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3"></span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3">***Remember how vulnerable people are and adjust responses to that vulnerability, as well as to where THEY are, not where WE are. People take in information as they are ready to, and it is always their decision to act or not act in every situation. Each person is at their own unique spot on their own journey.</span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3"></span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3">***There is no right or wrong path here, only what folks are willing to consider. Black and white thinking and responses are not helpful; often it is in the "gray areas" that people find a way to progress through the pain of their situation. </span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3"></span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3">***No one here is an authority---we are all struggling to find our way. Avoid a "tone of authority" by taking a step back and remembering that kindness, compassion and understanding are what we are all looking for---not hard and fast solutions---because our solutions will not be another person’s solutions.</span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3"></span></p><p><span style="color: #0000b3">***It can be harmful, and even dangerous, to offer advice outside these boundaries because we can’t know any other person’s full situation.</span></p><p></p><p></p><p>Read more: <a href="http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/guidelines-for-interacting-and-responding-on-the-pe-forum-updated-august-2015.60921/#ixzz44OqeUcbl" target="_blank">http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/guidelines-for-interacting-and-responding-on-the-pe-forum-updated-august-2015.60921/#ixzz44OqeUcbl</a></p><p></p><p></p><p>So I am not talking about banning words per se, just being more careful about how we use them. If some are considering detachment, but are not at that point, could several members responding adamantly about detachment actually thwart someone from participating?</p><p>I guess what I am trying to say is it is about being mindful and compassionate, not banning words.</p><p></p><p>But, I still don't like the term lurking.....LOL, but that is just me.</p><p></p><p>(((HUGS)))</p><p>leafy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="New Leaf, post: 683380, member: 19522"] Okay, not talking about banning words, just being careful with our responses according to the members posting, and their unique situations, where they are on the path. Also being mindful of what others responses are? JMO. [COLOR=#0000b3]From the guidelines on posting in PE------ ***Offer care, warmth, understanding, possibilities, options and ideas as opposed to a "tone of authority” and “absolute certainty.” ***Remember how vulnerable people are and adjust responses to that vulnerability, as well as to where THEY are, not where WE are. People take in information as they are ready to, and it is always their decision to act or not act in every situation. Each person is at their own unique spot on their own journey. ***There is no right or wrong path here, only what folks are willing to consider. Black and white thinking and responses are not helpful; often it is in the "gray areas" that people find a way to progress through the pain of their situation. ***No one here is an authority---we are all struggling to find our way. Avoid a "tone of authority" by taking a step back and remembering that kindness, compassion and understanding are what we are all looking for---not hard and fast solutions---because our solutions will not be another person’s solutions. ***It can be harmful, and even dangerous, to offer advice outside these boundaries because we can’t know any other person’s full situation.[/COLOR] Read more: [URL]http://www.conductdisorders.com/community/threads/guidelines-for-interacting-and-responding-on-the-pe-forum-updated-august-2015.60921/#ixzz44OqeUcbl[/URL] So I am not talking about banning words per se, just being more careful about how we use them. If some are considering detachment, but are not at that point, could several members responding adamantly about detachment actually thwart someone from participating? I guess what I am trying to say is it is about being mindful and compassionate, not banning words. But, I still don't like the term lurking.....LOL, but that is just me. (((HUGS))) leafy [/QUOTE]
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