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Support or Advice, I just need help. PLEASE!!
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<blockquote data-quote="PinkBanana" data-source="post: 618899" data-attributes="member: 17633"><p>MidwestMom,</p><p></p><p>For starters, your description is spot on, almost like you have met my son. </p><p></p><p>Before my son went into the out of home treatment facility, I woke up one night to find him standing at the foot of my bed completely naked. It truly scared me. I had a hard time sleeping for quite some time after that. I began having my younger son sleep in my room and I locked my bedroom door at night. (My husband travels for work and is gone Sun through Fri). It was the only way I felt we were both safe. I brought the incident up with his therapist and my son denied that it ever happened. </p><p></p><p>Another time, one of our neighbor kids was staying the night. He is between my kids ages and he was basically friends with both of my boys. This kid was sleeping in the downstairs living room. I went downstairs to turn lights and TV's off after kids had fallen asleep. (We only allow our 16yo to sleep in his bed due to his enuresis.) I found my son completely naked laying under the same blanket as the other kid. I noticed because his clothes were on the floor next to him. I panicked. As far as we know he never touched the boy. My son had several excuses as to why I found him in this situation. We stopped having other kids stay over. Again it was brought up with his therapist, he would just become defensive and rattle off all of his excuses. </p><p></p><p>He is not mean to animals, but he does like fire. I found several burned CD's in his room. His old bed was all charred up from him burning it during the night. He burned a whole in our couch. We have eliminated all traces of lighters or matches from our home, but somehow they keep popping up.</p><p></p><p>Trying to find a good out of home placement that our insurance will cover is difficult. My son is miserable being at home. I cannot do anything right. If I punish him, of course I am mean and evil, however he thinks his brother should get extremely harsh punishments. I am constantly being told by him that I am a horrible mother and how much he hates it here. I know he loves us, but he does not seem to have any idea how to treat people you love. He does not pick up those cues from us. </p><p></p><p>My son displays 80% of the attachment disorder symptoms you posted. Wow.</p><p></p><p>His mother is mentally ill. She was released from prison about 5 years ago. We attempted to let her be involved in my sons life, as he thought he wanted this. She was not very present when she was around him and soon started being very manipulative towards him (a trait I now know he inherited from her). She would go months without ever trying to contact him and eventually he decided he did not want much to do with her. Since getting out of prison, she has given birth to 2 more children which one of her sisters has adopted both of them. She likes the idea of saying she is a mom but does not behave as though she is a mom. She has also been in and out of the local psychiatric ward, sometimes being there for several months at a time. She pops a bunch of pills and then calls her therapist to tell him that she is attempting suicide. She cannot or will not (not quite sure which one) hold down a job. Her father is an OBGYN and bought her a home and a car and supports her. </p><p></p><p>I want to thank you for your advice, support and all the info. This forum actually brings tears to my eyes! Everybody is so kind and so full of helpful information! I wish I would have found this years ago!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PinkBanana, post: 618899, member: 17633"] MidwestMom, For starters, your description is spot on, almost like you have met my son. Before my son went into the out of home treatment facility, I woke up one night to find him standing at the foot of my bed completely naked. It truly scared me. I had a hard time sleeping for quite some time after that. I began having my younger son sleep in my room and I locked my bedroom door at night. (My husband travels for work and is gone Sun through Fri). It was the only way I felt we were both safe. I brought the incident up with his therapist and my son denied that it ever happened. Another time, one of our neighbor kids was staying the night. He is between my kids ages and he was basically friends with both of my boys. This kid was sleeping in the downstairs living room. I went downstairs to turn lights and TV's off after kids had fallen asleep. (We only allow our 16yo to sleep in his bed due to his enuresis.) I found my son completely naked laying under the same blanket as the other kid. I noticed because his clothes were on the floor next to him. I panicked. As far as we know he never touched the boy. My son had several excuses as to why I found him in this situation. We stopped having other kids stay over. Again it was brought up with his therapist, he would just become defensive and rattle off all of his excuses. He is not mean to animals, but he does like fire. I found several burned CD's in his room. His old bed was all charred up from him burning it during the night. He burned a whole in our couch. We have eliminated all traces of lighters or matches from our home, but somehow they keep popping up. Trying to find a good out of home placement that our insurance will cover is difficult. My son is miserable being at home. I cannot do anything right. If I punish him, of course I am mean and evil, however he thinks his brother should get extremely harsh punishments. I am constantly being told by him that I am a horrible mother and how much he hates it here. I know he loves us, but he does not seem to have any idea how to treat people you love. He does not pick up those cues from us. My son displays 80% of the attachment disorder symptoms you posted. Wow. His mother is mentally ill. She was released from prison about 5 years ago. We attempted to let her be involved in my sons life, as he thought he wanted this. She was not very present when she was around him and soon started being very manipulative towards him (a trait I now know he inherited from her). She would go months without ever trying to contact him and eventually he decided he did not want much to do with her. Since getting out of prison, she has given birth to 2 more children which one of her sisters has adopted both of them. She likes the idea of saying she is a mom but does not behave as though she is a mom. She has also been in and out of the local psychiatric ward, sometimes being there for several months at a time. She pops a bunch of pills and then calls her therapist to tell him that she is attempting suicide. She cannot or will not (not quite sure which one) hold down a job. Her father is an OBGYN and bought her a home and a car and supports her. I want to thank you for your advice, support and all the info. This forum actually brings tears to my eyes! Everybody is so kind and so full of helpful information! I wish I would have found this years ago!! [/QUOTE]
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