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Surely his demise can't be far away? Sorry, VERY long!
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<blockquote data-quote="blackgnat" data-source="post: 655681" data-attributes="member: 13561"><p>I wonder what you think of something that I'm kind of woolly about?</p><p></p><p>My ex has a camper van that is very old, but it still runs, has a fridge, sink, place to plug in electricity etc. He is willing to let Difficult Child live in it, as long as he gets his CO license, pays for insurance, a place to park it (probably in a campground which Difficult Child has researched and is nearby, for just $70 a year) and pay for the title.</p><p>They talked a lot about this while Difficult Child was in jail and while ex and I had our doubts, Difficult Child was very enthusiastic about it.</p><p></p><p>Now, as there have been no attempts by Difficult Child to look into any of this, the ex has withdrawn the offer, at least until he is willing to get his license, as a show of good faith that he'd be willing to take care of the van. Difficult Child is royally pissed off that ex is going back on his word-HIS understanding was that ex would let Difficult Child crash in the van.</p><p></p><p>As the soft touch, I wish that ex would just let Difficult Child sleep there, or when it's raining, or when he feels unsafe about sleeping rough. I don't think he needs to be able to drive it if it's parked in a campground. But at the same time, I feel that Difficult Child would probably just stay in it all day, probably drinking and drugging, reading, listening to music, etc. The premise was that Difficult Child would get a job and sleep in the van at night. For my own peace of mind, I'd rather know Difficult Child was in the van and not wandering around.</p><p></p><p>I do respect my ex's boundaries, but I just wish he would soften a bit about this. Why couldn't they have an arrangement where Difficult Child would only get the keys at a certain time of night and give them to his dad when he left for work in the morning? Difficult Child went to his father's apartment last night to change jackets because it was raining and I thought, "Just let him sleep in the van, for God's sake".</p><p></p><p>Ex says this kind of privilege must be earned and I agree, but exgf's mother feels that Difficult Child has NO coping skills and is lost-to the extent that he wants to come back to Illinois because he doesn't want to be by himself. That's NOT going to happen, by the way-there is NOTHING here for him and NOTHING I can do for him...Plus I am thinking of moving to CO-I really would like access to my younger son-and Difficult Child, on a VERY limited basis. If he is still around...</p><p></p><p>Do you all smell a rat? Am I in total denial? I think I already know the answer, but would appreciate any input.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="blackgnat, post: 655681, member: 13561"] I wonder what you think of something that I'm kind of woolly about? My ex has a camper van that is very old, but it still runs, has a fridge, sink, place to plug in electricity etc. He is willing to let Difficult Child live in it, as long as he gets his CO license, pays for insurance, a place to park it (probably in a campground which Difficult Child has researched and is nearby, for just $70 a year) and pay for the title. They talked a lot about this while Difficult Child was in jail and while ex and I had our doubts, Difficult Child was very enthusiastic about it. Now, as there have been no attempts by Difficult Child to look into any of this, the ex has withdrawn the offer, at least until he is willing to get his license, as a show of good faith that he'd be willing to take care of the van. Difficult Child is royally pissed off that ex is going back on his word-HIS understanding was that ex would let Difficult Child crash in the van. As the soft touch, I wish that ex would just let Difficult Child sleep there, or when it's raining, or when he feels unsafe about sleeping rough. I don't think he needs to be able to drive it if it's parked in a campground. But at the same time, I feel that Difficult Child would probably just stay in it all day, probably drinking and drugging, reading, listening to music, etc. The premise was that Difficult Child would get a job and sleep in the van at night. For my own peace of mind, I'd rather know Difficult Child was in the van and not wandering around. I do respect my ex's boundaries, but I just wish he would soften a bit about this. Why couldn't they have an arrangement where Difficult Child would only get the keys at a certain time of night and give them to his dad when he left for work in the morning? Difficult Child went to his father's apartment last night to change jackets because it was raining and I thought, "Just let him sleep in the van, for God's sake". Ex says this kind of privilege must be earned and I agree, but exgf's mother feels that Difficult Child has NO coping skills and is lost-to the extent that he wants to come back to Illinois because he doesn't want to be by himself. That's NOT going to happen, by the way-there is NOTHING here for him and NOTHING I can do for him...Plus I am thinking of moving to CO-I really would like access to my younger son-and Difficult Child, on a VERY limited basis. If he is still around... Do you all smell a rat? Am I in total denial? I think I already know the answer, but would appreciate any input. [/QUOTE]
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Surely his demise can't be far away? Sorry, VERY long!
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